True Believer - Nicholas Sparks

[Dalyia]

True BelieverTwelveMy main man!” Alvin shouted into the receiver. “Life treating you good down south?” Despite the static on Jeremy’s cell phone, Alvin sounded remarkably chipper. “I’m fine. I was calling to see if you’d still like to come on down and help me.”“I’m already gathering my gear,” he answered, sounding out of breath. “Nate called me an hour ago and told me all about it. I’ll meet you at Greenleaf later tonight—Nate made the reservation. But, anyway, my flight leaves in a couple of hours. And believe me, I can’t wait. Another few days in this stuff, and I’ll go crazy.”“What are you talking about?”“Haven’t you been reading the papers or watching the news?”“Of course. I’ve yet to miss an issue of the Boone Creek Weekly.”“Huh?”“Never mind,” Jeremy said. “It’s not important.”“Well, anyway, it’s been an absolute blizzard since you left,” Alvin informed him. “And I mean North Pole stuff, where even Rudolph’s nose is worthless. Manhattan is practically buried. You got out of here just in time. Since you’ve left, this is the first day that flights are even close to being on schedule. I had to pull a few strings to even get the flight I did. How can you not know about this?”As Alvin explained, Jeremy tapped his computer keys, calling up the Weather Channel on the Internet. On the national map, the Northeast was a blanket of white.L-I-B, he thought. Who could have guessed?“I guess I’ve been busy,” he said.“Hiding’s more like it,” Alvin said. “But I hope she’s worth it.”“What are you talking about?”“Don’t bother pulling my chain. We’re friends, remember? Nate’s been in a panic because he can’t reach you, you haven’t been reading the papers, and you haven’t been watching the news. We both know what that means. You always get like this when you meet someone new.”“Look, Alvin . . .”“Is she pretty? I’ll bet she’s beautiful, right? You always strike gold. Makes me sick.”Jeremy hesitated before answering, then finally gave in. If Alvin was coming down, he’d learn soon enough, anyway.“Yeah, she’s pretty. But it’s not what you think. We’re just friends.”“I’m sure,” he said, laughing. “But what you consider friends and what I consider friends are just a little different.”“Not this time,” Jeremy said.“Does she have a sister?” Alvin asked, ignoring the comment.“No.”“But she has friends, right? And I’m not interested in the ugly one, remember . . .”Jeremy felt his headache coming on again, and his tone took on an edge. “I’m not in the mood for this, okay?”Alvin paused on the other end. “Hey, what’s going on here?” he asked. “I’m just joking around.”“Some of your jokes aren’t funny.”“You like her, don’t you? I mean, you like her a lot.”“I told you that we’re just friends.”“I can’t believe this. You’re falling in love.”“No,” Jeremy said.“Hey, pal, I know you, so don’t try to deny it. And I think that’s great. Weird but great. But unfortunately, I have to cut this short if I’m going to catch my flight. Traffic is miserable, as you can probably imagine. But I can’t wait to see the woman who finally tamed you.”“She didn’t tame me,” Jeremy protested. “Why aren’t you listening to me?”“I am listening,” he said. “I just hear the things you’re not saying.”“Yeah, whatever. When will you be here?”“I’m guessing around seven tonight. I’ll see you then. And, by the way, say hello from me, okay? Tell her I’m dying to meet her and her friend . . .”Jeremy ended the call before Alvin had a chance to finish, and, as if to underscore the point, he shoved his phone back into his pocket.No wonder he’d been keeping it turned off. It must have been a subconscious decision, one based on the fact that both his friends had a tendency to be irritating at times. First, there was Nate the Energizer Bunny and his never-ending search for fame. And now this.Alvin didn’t have a clue as to what he was talking about. They may have been friends, they may have spent a lot of Friday nights staring at women over beers, they may have talked about life for hours, and deep down, Alvin may have honestly believed that he was right. But he wasn’t, simply because he couldn’t be.The facts, after all, spoke for themselves. For one thing, Jeremy hadn’t loved a woman in years, and though it had been a long time, he could still remember how he’d felt back then. He was certain that he would have recognized the feeling again, and frankly, he didn’t. And in light of the fact that he’d just met the woman, the whole idea seemed preposterous. Even his highly emotional Italian mother didn’t believe that true love could blossom overnight. Like his brothers and sisters-in-law, she wanted nothing more for him than to marry and start a family, but if he showed up at her doorstep and said that he’d met someone two days ago and knew she was the one for him, his mother would smack him with a broom, curse in Italian, and drag him to church, sure that he had some serious sins that needed confessing.His mother knew men. She’d married one, raised six boys, and was sure she’d seen it all. She knew exactly how men tended to think when it came to women, and although she relied on common sense instead of science, she was completely accurate in her judgment that love wasn’t possible in just a couple of days. Love could be set in motion quickly, but true love needed time to grow into something strong and enduring. Love was, above all, about commitment and dedication and a belief that spending years with a certain person would create something greater than the sum of what the two could accomplish separately. Only time, however, could show whether you’d been accurate in your judgment.Lust, meanwhile, could happen almost instantly, and that’s why his mother would have smacked him. To her, the description of lust was simple: two people learn they’re compatible, attraction grows, and the ancient instinct to preserve the species kicks in. All of which meant that while lust was a possibility, he couldn’t love Lexie.So there it was. Case closed. Alvin was wrong, Jeremy was right, and once again, the truth had set him free.He smiled with satisfaction for a moment before his brow began to wrinkle.And yet . . .Well, the thing was, it didn’t quite feel like lust, either. Not this morning, anyway. Because even more than wanting to hold her or kiss her, he simply ached to see her again. To spend time with her. To talk to her. He wanted to watch her roll her eyes when he said something ridiculous, he wanted to feel her hand on his arm like the day before. He wanted to watch her nervously tuck strands of hair behind her ear, and listen as she told him about her childhood. He wanted to ask her about her dreams and hopes for the future, to know her secrets.But that wasn’t the strange part. The strange part was that he couldn’t perceive an ulterior motive for his impulses. Granted, he wouldn’t say no if she wanted to sleep with him, but even if she didn’t, just spending time with her would be enough for now.Deep down, he simply lacked an ulterior motive. He’d already made the decision that he would never again put Lexie in the position he had the night before. It had taken a lot of courage, he thought, to say what she had. More courage than he had. After all, in the two days they’d seen each other, he hadn’t even been able to tell her that he’d been married before.But if it couldn’t be love and it didn’t feel like lust, what was it? Like? Did he like her? Of course, he did, but that word didn’t quite capture his feelings, either. It was a little too . . . vague and soft around the edges. People liked ice cream. People liked to watch television. It meant nothing, and it didn’t come close to explaining why, for the first time, he felt the urge to tell someone else the truth about his divorce. His brothers didn’t know the truth, nor did his parents. But, for whatever reason, he couldn’t shake the realization that he wanted Lexie to know; and right now she was nowhere to be found.Two minutes later, Jeremy’s phone rang, and he recognized the number on the screen of his cell phone. Though not in the mood, he knew he had to answer, or the man would probably burst an artery.“Hey there,” Jeremy said. “What’s happening?”“Jeremy!” Nate shouted. Through the static, Jeremy could barely hear him. “Great news! You can’t believe how busy I’ve been.It’s been a madhouse! We’ve got a conference call with ABC attwo o’clock!”“Great,” he said.“Hold on. I can’t hear you. This reception is terrible.”“Sorry . . .”“Jeremy! Are you still there? You’re breaking up!”“Yeah, Nate, I’m here . . .”“Jeremy?” Nate shouted, oblivious to his answer. “Listen, if you can still hear me, you’ve got to use a public phone and call me here. At two o’clock! Your career depends on this! Your entire future depends on this!”“Yeah, I got it.”“Oh, this is ridiculous,” he said, almost as if talking to himself. “I can’t hear a thing you’re saying. Hit a button if you caught everything I’m saying.”Jeremy pressed the 6.“Great! Fantastic! Two o’clock! And be yourself! Except for the sarcastic part, I mean. These people seem pretty uptight . . .”Jeremy hung up the phone, wondering how long it would take for Nate to realize that he wasn’t on the line anymore.Jeremy waited. Then waited some more.He paced the library, he wandered past Lexie’s office, he peeked out the window for signs of her car, feeling a growing sense of uneasiness as the minutes ticked by. It was just a hunch, but nothing about her absence this morning seemed right. Nonetheless, he did his best to convince himself otherwise. He told himself that she would come in eventually, and later he’d probably laugh about his ridiculous feelings. Still, now that he was finished with his research—other than possibly finding anecdotes in some of the diaries, which he hadn’t finished going through yet—he wasn’t sure what to do next.Greenleaf was out—he didn’t want to spend any more time there than he had to, even though he was beginning to like the towel hangers. Alvin wouldn’t be here until the evening, and the last thing he wanted was to wander around town, where he might be corralled by Mayor Gherkin. Nor did he want to hang around the library all day.He really wished Lexie had been a bit more specific in her note about when she might show up. Or even where she’d gone. He couldn’t make sense of the note even after reading it a third time. Had the lack of detail been inadvertent or something she’d done on purpose? Neither possibility made him feel any better. He had to get out of here; it was hard not to think the worst.After gathering his things, he went downstairs and paused at the reception desk. The elderly volunteer was buried in a book. Standing before her, he cleared his throat. When she looked up, she beamed. “Well, Mr. Marsh!” she said. “I saw you come in earlier, but you looked preoccupied, so I just let you go. What can I do for you?”Jeremy adjusted the notes beneath his arm, attempting to sound as casual as he could.“Do you know where Ms. Darnell is? I got a note that said that she was out, and I was just wondering when she might be coming in.”“That’s funny,” she said, “she was here when I came in.” She checked the calendar on her desk. “She doesn’t have any meetings scheduled and I don’t see any other appointments. Have you checked her office? Maybe she’s locked herself in. She does that quite a bit when the work starts piling up.”“I have,” he said. “Would you know if she happens to have a cell phone where I can reach her?”“She doesn’t—that I know for sure. She’s told me that when she’s off and about, the last thing she wants is for someone to find her.”“Well . . . thanks, anyway.”“Is there anything I could help you with?”“No,” he said, “I just needed her help on my story.”“I’m sorry I can’t be more help to you.”“That’s okay.”“Have you thought about checking Herbs? She might be helping Doris get things ready for the weekend. Or maybe she went home. The thing about Lexie is that you can never predict anything about her. I’ve learned not to be surprised by anything she does.”“Thanks, anyway. But if she comes in, will you tell her that I was looking for her?”Feeling more agitated than ever, Jeremy left the library.Before heading to Herbs, Jeremy swung by Lexie’s house, noting the drawn curtains in the window and the fact that her car was gone. Although there was nothing out of the ordinary about the scene before him, it again struck him as wrong somehow, and the uneasiness only deepened as he retraced the roads back to town.The morning rush at Herbs had died down, and the restaurant was in the twilight period between breakfast and lunch, when things were cleaned up from the last rush and preparations were being made for the next. The staff outnumbered the remaining patrons four to one, and it took only a moment to see that Lexie wasn’t here, either. Rachel was wiping a table and waved a towel when she saw him.“Morning, darlin’,” she said, approaching. “It’s a little late, but I’m sure we can whip up some breakfast if you’re hungry.”Jeremy slipped his keys into his pocket. “No, thanks,” he said. “I’m not that hungry. But would you happen to know if Doris is around? I’d love to talk to her if she has a moment.”“Back for her again, huh?” She smiled and nodded over her shoulder. “She’s in the back. I’ll tell her you’re here. And by the way, that was quite a party last night. People were talking about you all morning, and the mayor dropped by to see if you’d recovered. I think he was disappointed you weren’t here.”“I enjoyed it.”“Do you want some coffee or tea while you’re waiting?”“No, thanks,” he answered.She disappeared into the back, and a minute later, Doris emerged, wiping her hands on her apron. Her cheek was smudged with dough, but even from a distance, he could see the bags under her eyes, and she seemed to be moving more slowly than usual.“Sorry about looking like this,” she said, gesturing at herself. “You caught me mixing dough. Last night set me back a little for the weekend, and it’s going to take a bit to catch up before the crowds tomorrow.”Remembering what Lexie had told him, he asked, “How many people are you expecting this weekend?”“Who knows?” she said. “Usually, a couple of hundred come in for the tour, sometimes a bit more. The mayor was hoping for close to a thousand for the tour this year, but it’s always a wild guess for me to figure out how many will come in for breakfast and lunch.”“If the mayor’s right, that’s quite a jump this year.”“Well, take his estimate for what it’s worth. Tom has a tendency to be overly optimistic, but he’s got to create a sense of urgency to get everything ready in time. And besides, even if people don’t do the tour, folks still like to come to the parade on Saturday. The Shriners will be here zooming around with their cars, you know, and kids love to see them. And there’ll be a petting zoo, too, this year, which is new.”“Sounds great.”“It would be better if it wasn’t in the middle of winter. The Pamlico Festival always draws the biggest crowds, but that’s in June, and we usually have one of those traveling carnivals set up shop that weekend. Now, those are weekends that can make or break a business. Talk about stress. It’s about ten times what I’m going through now.”He smiled. “Life here never ceases to amaze me.”“Don’t knock it till you try it. I have a funny feeling you’d love it here.”She sounded almost as if she was testing him, and he wasn’t quite sure how to respond. Behind them, Rachel cleared a table while jawing with the cook, who was half a room away. Both were laughing at something one or the other had said.“But, anyway,” Doris said, letting him off the hook, “I’m glad you came by. Lexie mentioned that she told you about my notebook. She warned me that you probably wouldn’t believe a word of it, but you’re welcome to look through it if you’d like. It’s in my office in the back.”“I’d like that,” he said. “She told me you kept quite a record.”“I did my best. It’s probably not up to your standards, but then again, I never thought anyone but me would read it.”“I’m sure I’ll be amazed. But speaking of Lexie, that’s part of the reason I came by. Have you seen her around? She wasn’t at the library today.”She nodded. “She came by the house this morning. That’s how I knew to bring my book. She told me you two saw the lights last night.”“We did.”“And?”“They were amazing, but like you said, they weren’t ghosts.”She looked at him, satisfied. “And I take it that you’ve already figured everything out, or you wouldn’t be here otherwise.”“I think so.”“Good for you,” she said. She motioned over her shoulder. “I’m sorry I can’t chat more now, but I’m kind of busy, so let me get my notebook for you. Who knows, maybe you’ll want to do a story about my amazing powers next.”“You never know,” he said. “I just might.”As Jeremy watched her vanish into the kitchen, he wondered about their conversation. It had been perfectly pleasant but curiously impersonal. And he noticed that Doris hadn’t really responded to his question about Lexie’s whereabouts. Nor had she even ventured a guess, which seemed to suggest that—for whatever reason—she viewed the subject of Lexie as suddenly off-limits. Which wasn’t good. He looked up to see her approaching again. She wore the same pleasant smile as she had before, but this time it gave him a sinking feeling in his stomach.“Now, if you have any questions about this,” she said, handing the notebook over, “don’t hesitate to call. And feel free to make copies if you want, but bring this back before you leave. It’s pretty special to me.”“I’ll do that,” he promised.She remained standing silently before him, and Jeremy got the impression that it was her way of telling him their conversation was at an end. He, on the other hand, wasn’t about to give up so easily.“Oh, one more thing,” he said.“Yes?”“Would it be okay if I return the notebook to Lexie? If I happen to see her today?”“That’s fine,” she said. “But I’ll be here, too, just in case.”As he caught her obvious meaning, he felt his stomach sink even more.“Did she say anything about me?” he asked. “When you saw her this morning?”“Not much. However, she did say that you’d probably be coming by.”“Did she seem okay?”“Lexie,” she began slowly, as if choosing her words carefully, “is hard to read sometimes, so I’m not sure I can answer that. But I’m sure she’ll be okay, if that’s what you’re asking.”“Was she angry with me?”“No, that I can tell you. She definitely wasn’t angry.”Waiting for more, Jeremy said nothing. In the silence Doris took a long breath. For the first time since they’d met, he noticed her age in the lines around her eyes.“I like you, Jeremy, you know that,” she said, her voice soft. “But you’re putting me on the spot. What you have to understand is that I have certain loyalties, and Lexie is one of them.”“Which means what?” he asked, feeling his throat go dry.“It means that I know what you want and what you’re asking, but I can’t answer your questions. What I can say is that if Lexie wanted you to know where she is, she would have told you.”“Will I see her again? Before I leave?”“I don’t know,” she said. “I suppose that’s up to her.”With that comment, his mind began to absorb the fact that she was really gone.“I don’t understand why she’d do something like this,” he said.She gave a sad smile. “Yes,” she said, “I think you do.”She was gone.Like an echo, the words kept repeating themselves. Behind the wheel on the way to Greenleaf, Jeremy tried to analyze the facts with cool remove. He didn’t panic. He never panicked. No matter how wild he’d felt, no matter how much he wanted to press Doris for information about Lexie’s whereabouts or state of mind, he’d simply thanked her for her help and headed out to the car, as if he’d expected nothing different.And besides, he reminded himself, there was no reason to panic. It wasn’t as if something terrible had happened to her. It simply boiled down to the fact that she didn’t want to see him again. Perhaps he should have seen it coming. He’d expected too much from her, even when she’d made it perfectly clear from the very beginning that she wasn’t interested.He shook his head, thinking it was no wonder that she’d left.As modern as she was in some ways, she was traditional in others, and she was probably tired of having to deal with his transparent ploys. It was probably easier for her to simply leave town than to explain her reasoning to someone like him.So where did that leave him? Either she would come back or she wouldn’t. If she came back, no problem. But if she didn’t . . . well, that’s where reality started getting complicated. He could sit back and accept her decision, or he could try to track her down. If there was one thing he was good at, it was finding people. Using public records, friendly conversations, and the right sites on the Web, he’d learned how to follow a trail of bread crumbs to anyone’s doorstep. He doubted, however, that any of that would be necessary. After all, she’d already given him the answer he needed, and he was sure he knew exactly where she’d gone. Which meant that he could handle this any way he wanted.His thoughts stopped again.The thing was, it didn’t quite help him with the idea of what he should do. He reminded himself that he had a conference call in just a few hours, one with important ramifications for his career, and if he headed off to look for Lexie now, he doubted he’d be able to find a pay phone when he needed one. Alvin would be arriving later this evening—possibly the last of the foggy evenings—and though Alvin could handle the filming on his own tonight, they had to work together tomorrow. Not to mention that he needed a nap—he had another long night ahead, and even his bones were tired.On the other hand, he didn’t want everything to end like this. He wanted to see Lexie, he needed to see her. A voice in his head warned him not to let his emotions govern his actions, and rationally, he couldn’t see how anything good could come of him traipsing off in search of her. Even if he found her, she’d probably ignore him or, worse, find it creepy. And in the meantime, Nate would probably have a stroke, Alvin would be stranded and furious, and his story and future career might just go down the tubes.In the end, the decision was simple. Pulling his car into the spot in front of his cottage at Greenleaf, he nodded to himself. Putting it in those terms made his choice clear. After all, he hadn’t spent the last fifteen years using logic and science without learning something along the way.Now, he thought to himself, all he had to do was pack.

[Dalyia]

True BelieverThirteenOkay, she admitted, she was a coward.It wasn’t the easiest thing for her to own up to the fact that she’d run away, but hey, she wasn’t exactly thinking clearly these past couple of days, and she could forgive herself for not being perfect. The truth was, if she had stayed around, things would have become even more complicated. It didn’t matter that she liked him and that he liked her; she woke up this morning knowing that she had to end things before they went too far, and when she pulled in the sandy driveway out front, she knew she’d done the right thing by coming here.The place wasn’t much to look at. The old cottage was weathered and blended into the sea oats that surrounded it. The small, rectangular white-curtained windows were coated with salted mist, and the siding had streaks of gray, remnants from the fury of a dozen hurricanes. In some ways, she’d always considered the cottage a time capsule of sorts; most of the furniture was over twenty years old, the pipes groaned when she turned on the shower, and she had to light the stove burners with a match. But the memories of spending parts of her youth here never ceased to calm her, and after storing her bags and the groceries she’d picked up for the weekend, she’d opened the windows to air out the place. Then, grabbing a blanket, she settled into a rocker on the back porch, wanting nothing more than to watch the ocean. The steady roar of the waves was soothing, almost hypnotic, and when the sun broke through the clouds and beams of light stretched toward the water like individual fingers from above, she found herself holding her breath.She did that every time she came here. The first time she’d seen the light breaking through this way was soon after her visit to the cemetery with Doris, when she was still a little girl, and she remembered thinking that her parents had found another way to make their presence known in her life. Like heaven-sent angels, she believed they were watching out for her, always present but never intervening, as if they felt that she would always make the right decisions.For a long time, she’d needed to believe in such things, simply because she’d often felt alone. Her grandparents had been kind and wonderful, but as much as she loved them for their care and sacrifice, she’d never quite gotten used to the feeling of being different from her peers. Her friends’ parents played softball on the weekends and looked youthful even in the soft morning light of church, an observation that made her wonder what, if anything, she was missing.She couldn’t talk to Doris about these things. Nor could she talk to Doris about the guilt she felt as a result. No matter how she phrased it, Doris’s feelings would have been hurt, and even as a young girl, she’d known that.But still, that feeling of being different had left its mark. Not only on her but on Doris as well, and it began to manifest itself during her teenage years. When Lexie would push the limits, Doris would frequently give in to avoid an argument, leaving Lexie with the belief that she could establish her own rules. She’d been a bit on the wild side when she was young, made mistakes and had too many regrets, but somehow turned serious during college. In her new, more mature incarnation, she embraced the idea that maturity meant thinking about risk long before you pondered the reward, and that success and happiness in life were as much about avoiding mistakes as making your mark in the world.Last night, she knew, she’d almost made a mistake. She’d expected him to try to kiss her, and she was pleased by how resolute she’d been when he wanted to come inside.She knew she’d hurt his feelings, and she was sorry for that. But what he probably didn’t realize was that it wasn’t until after he’d driven off that her heart had stopped pounding, because part of her had wanted to let him inside, no matter what it might have led to. She knew better, but she couldn’t help it. Even worse, as she tossed and turned in her bed last night, she realized she might not have the strength to do the right thing again.In all honesty, she should have seen it coming. As the evening had worn on, she found herself comparing Jeremy to both Avery and Mr. Renaissance, and to her surprise, Jeremy more than held his own. He had Avery’s wit and sense of humor and Mr. Renaissance’s intelligence and charm, but Jeremy seemed more comfortable with himself than either of them. Perhaps she should just chalk it up to the wonderful day she’d had, something that hadn’t happened in a long time. When was the last time she’d had a spontaneous lunch? Or sat up on Riker’s Hill? Or visited the cemetery after a party, when normally she would have gone straight to bed? No doubt the excitement and unpredictability had reminded her of how happy she’d been when she still believed that Avery and Mr. Renaissance were the men of her dreams.But she’d been wrong then, just as she was wrong now. She knew Jeremy would solve the mystery today—okay, maybe it was just a feeling, but she was sure of it, since the answer was in one of the diaries and all he had to do was find it—and she had no doubt that he would have asked her to celebrate the solution with him. Had she been in town, the two of them would have spent most of the day together, and she didn’t want that. Then again, deep down, it was exactly what she wanted, leaving her feeling more confused than she’d been in years.Doris had intuited every bit of it this morning when Lexie stopped by, but that wasn’t surprising. Lexie could feel the exhaustion around her own eyes and knew she looked like a wreck when she showed up out of the blue. After throwing a few days’ worth of clothes into the suitcase, she’d left her house without showering; she didn’t even attempt to explain what she was feeling. Even so, Doris had simply nodded when Lexie told her she had to go. Doris, tired though she was, seemed to understand that while she’d set the whole thing in motion, she hadn’t anticipated what might happen as a result. That was the thing about premonitions; while they might be accurate in the short term, anything beyond that was impossible to know.So she’d come here because she had to, if only to preserve her sanity, and she’d return to Boone Creek when things were back to normal. It wouldn’t take long. In a couple of days, people would have stopped talking about the ghosts and the historic homes and the stranger in town, and the visiting tourists would be nothing but a memory. The mayor would be back on the golf course, Rachel would date the wrong sorts of men, and Rodney would probably find a way to accidentally bump into Lexie near the library, no doubt breathing a sigh of relief when he realized their relationship could go back to the way it once was.Maybe it wasn’t an exciting life, but it was her life, and she wasn’t about to let anyone or anything upset the balance. In another place and time, she might have felt differently, but thinking along those lines was pointless now. As she continued to stare out over the water, she forced herself not to imagine what might have been.On the porch, Lexie tugged the blanket tighter around her shoulders. She was a big girl and she’d get over him, just as she’d gotten over the others. She was certain about it. But even with the comfort of that realization, the roiling sea reminded her again of her feelings for Jeremy, and it took everything she had to keep her tears in check.It had seemed relatively simple when Jeremy set out, and he’d rushed through his room at Greenleaf, making the necessary plans as he did so. Grab the map and his wallet, just in case. Leave the computer because he didn’t need it. Ditto his notes. Put Doris’s book in his leather satchel and bring it along. Write a note for Alvin and leave it at the front desk, despite the fact that Jed didn’t seem too pleased about it. Make sure he had the recharger for his phone—and go.He was in and out in less than ten minutes, on his way to Swan Quarter, where the ferry would take him to Ocracoke, a village in the Outer Banks. From there, he’d head north on Highway 12 to Buxton. He figured it was the route she would have taken, and all he had to do was follow the same path and he’d reach the place in just a couple of hours.But while the drive to Swan Quarter had been an easy one on straight and empty roads, he’d found himself thinking about Lexie and pressed the accelerator harder, trying to ward off the jitters. But jitters were just another word for panic, and he didn’t panic. He prided himself on that. Nonetheless, whenever he was forced to slow the car—in places like Belhaven and Leechville— he found himself tapping the wheel with his fingers and muttering under his breath.It was an odd feeling for him, one that only grew stronger as he drew nearer to his destination. He couldn’t explain it, but somehow he didn’t want to analyze it. For one of the few times in his life, he was moving on autopilot, doing exactly the opposite of what logic demanded, thinking only about how she’d react when she saw him.Just when he thought he was beginning to understand the reason for his odd behavior, Jeremy found himself at the ferry station staring at a thin, uniformed man who barely looked up from the magazine he was reading. The ferry to Ocracoke, he learned, didn’t run with the same regularity as the one from Staten Island to Manhattan, and he’d missed the last departure of the day, which meant he could either come back tomorrow or cancel his plan altogether, neither of which he was willing to consider.“Are you sure there’s no other way that I can get to Hatteras Lighthouse?” he asked, feeling his heart pick up speed. “This is important.”“You could drive it, I suppose.”“How long would that take?”“Depends on how fast you drive.”Obviously, Jeremy thought. “Let’s say I drove fast.”The man shrugged, as if the whole topic bored him. “Five or six hours maybe. You’d have to head north till you get to Plymouth, then take 64 over Roanoke Island, then into Whalebone. From there, you head south into Buxton. The lighthouse is right there.”Jeremy checked his watch; it was already coming up on one o’clock; by the time he got there, Alvin would probably be pulling into Boone Creek. No good.“Is there another place to catch the ferry?”“There’s one out of Cedar Island.”“Great. Where’s that?”“It’s about three hours in the other direction. But again, you’d have to wait until tomorrow morning.”Over the man’s shoulder, he saw a poster displaying the various lighthouses of North Carolina. Hatteras, the grandest of them all, was in the center.“What if I told you this was an emergency?” he asked.For the first time, the man looked up.“Is it an emergency?”“Let’s just say that it is.”“Then I’d call the Coast Guard. Or maybe the sheriff.”“Ah,” Jeremy said, trying to remain patient. “But what you’re telling me is that there’s no way for me to get out there right now? From here, I mean.”The man brought a finger to his chin. “I suppose you could take a boat, if you’re in such a hurry.”Now we’re getting somewhere, Jeremy thought. “And how would I arrange that?”“I don’t know. No one’s ever asked.”Jeremy hopped back into his car, finally admitting that he was beginning to panic.Maybe it was because he’d already come this far, or maybe it was because he realized his final words to Lexie the night before had signaled a deeper truth, but something else had taken hold of him and he wasn’t going back. He refused to go back, not after getting this close.Nate would be expecting his call, but suddenly, that didn’t seem as important to him as it once was. Nor did the fact that Alvin would be arriving; if all went well, they could still film both this evening and tomorrow evening. He had ten hours until the lights would appear; in a fast boat, he figured that he could reach Hatteras in two. It gave him plenty of time to get there, talk to Lexie, and come back, assuming he could find someone to take him there.Anything could go wrong, of course. He might not be able to hire a boat, but if that happened, he’d drive to Buxton if he had to. Once there, however, he couldn’t even be sure that he’d find her.Nothing about this entire scenario made sense. But who cared? Once in a while, everyone was entitled to be a bit flaky, and now it was his turn. He had cash in his wallet, and he’d find a way to get there. He’d take the risk and see how things turned out with her, if only to prove to himself that he could leave her and never think about her again.That’s what this was all about, he knew. When Doris intimated that he might never see her again, his thoughts about her had gone into overdrive. Sure, he was leaving in a couple of days, but that didn’t mean this had to be over. Not yet, anyway. He could visit down here, she could come up to New York and if it was meant to be, they’d somehow work it out. People did that all the time, right? But even if that wasn’t possible, even if she was resolute in her determination to end things completely, he wanted to hear her say it. Only then could he return to New York knowing he’d had no other choice.And yet, as he came to a sliding stop at the first marina he saw, he realized he didn’t want her to speak those words. He wasn’t going to Buxton to say good-bye or to hear her say that she never wanted to see him again. In fact, he thought with amazement, he knew that he was going there to find out if Alvin had been right all along.Late afternoon was Lexie’s favorite time of day. The soft winter sunlight, combined with the austere natural beauty of the landscape, made the world appear dreamlike.Even the lighthouse, with its black and white candy-cane pattern, seemed like a mirage from here, and as she walked the length of the beach, she tried to imagine how difficult it had been for the sailors and fishermen to navigate the point before it had been built. The waters just offshore, with their shallow seabed and shifting shoals, were nicknamed the Graveyard of the Atlantic, and a thousand wrecks dotted the seafloor. The Monitor, which engaged in the first battle between ironclads during the Civil War, had been lost here. So had the Central America, laden with California gold, whose sinking helped cause the financial panic of 1857. Blackbeard’s ship, Queen Anne’s Revenge, had supposedly been found in the Beaufort Inlet, and half a dozen German U-boats sunk during World War II were now visited almost daily by scuba divers.Her grandfather had been a history buff, and every time they walked the beach holding hands, he told her stories about the ships that had been lost over the centuries. She learned about hurricanes and dangerous surf and faulty navigation that stranded boats until they were torn apart by the raging surf. Though she wasn’t particularly interested and was sometimes even frightened by the images conjured up, his slow, melodic drawl was strangely soothing, and she never tried to change the subject. Even though she was young at the time, she sensed that talking to her about these things meant a lot to him. Years later, she would learn that his ship had been torpedoed in World War II and that he’d barely survived.Recalling those walks made her miss her grandfather with sudden intensity. The strolls had been part of their daily routine, something for just the two of them, and they usually went out in the hour just before dinner, when Doris was cooking. More often than not, he’d be reading in the chair with his glasses propped on his nose, and he’d close the book with a sigh and set it aside. Rising from his seat, he’d ask if she’d like to take a walk to see the wild horses.The thought of seeing the horses always thrilled her. She wasn’t quite sure why; she’d never ridden a horse, nor did she particularly want to, but she remembered how she would jump up and run to the door as soon as her grandfather mentioned it. Usually, the horses kept themselves at a distance from people and darted away whenever someone approached, but at dusk, they liked to graze, lowering their defenses, if only for a few minutes. It was often possible to get close enough to see their distinctive markings and, if you were lucky, to hear them snorting and whinnying a warning not to come any closer.The horses were descended from the Spanish mustangs, and their presence on the Outer Banks dated from 1523. These days, there were all sorts of government regulations that ensured their survival, and they were as much a part of the surroundings as deer were in Pennsylvania, with the only problem being occasional overpopulation. People who lived here largely ignored them unless they became a nuisance, but for many vacationers, seeing them was one of the highlights of their visit. Lexie considered herself something of a local, but watching them always made her feel as if she were young again, with all of life’s pleasures and expectations ahead of her.She wanted to feel that way now, if only to escape the pressures of her adult life. Doris had called to tell her that Jeremy had come in looking for her. It hadn’t surprised her. Though she’d assumed he would wonder what he’d done wrong or why she’d left, she also felt he’d get over it quickly. Jeremy was just one of those blessed people who were confident in everything they did, forever moving forward without a regret or backward glance.Avery had been that way, and even now she still remembered how hurt she’d been by his sense of entitlement, his indifference to her pain. Looking back, she knew she should have seen his character flaws for what they were, but at the time, she hadn’t seen the warning signs: the way his stare lingered just a bit too long when he was looking at other women, or the way he’d squeeze just a bit too hard when he hugged women he swore were only friends. In the beginning, she’d wanted to believe him when he said he’d only been unfaithful once, but bits and pieces of forgotten conversations had resurfaced: a friend from college had long ago confessed that she’d heard rumors about Avery and a particular sorority sister; one of his co-workers mentioned a few too many unexplained absences from work. She hated to think of herself as naive, but she had been, and even more than being disappointed in him, she’d long since realized that she was disappointed in herself. She’d told herself she would get over it, that she would meet someone better . . . someone like Mr. Renaissance, who proved once and for all that she wasn’t a good judge of men. Nor, it seemed, could she keep one.It wasn’t easy to admit that, and there were moments when she wondered whether she might have done something to drive both men off. Okay, maybe not Mr. Renaissance, since theirs was less a relationship than a fling, but what about Avery? She’d loved him and thought he loved her. Sure, it was easy to say that Avery was a cad and that the demise of their relationship had been all his fault, but at the same time, he must have felt that the relationship was lacking somehow. That she was lacking somehow. But in what way? Had she been too pushy? Was she boring? Was he unsatisfied in the bedroom? Why didn’t he run out afterward, looking for her and begging forgiveness? These were the quesions she’d never been able to answer. Her friends, of course, assured her that she didn’t know what she was talking about, and Doris had said the same thing. Even so, it wasn’t entirely clear to her what had happened. There were, after all, two sides to every story, and even now she sometimes fantasized about calling him to ask if there was anything she could have done differently.As one of her friends pointed out, it was typical of women to worry about such things. Men seemed immune to these sorts of insecurities. Even if they weren’t, they’d learned to either disguise their feelings or bury them deep enough so as not to be crippled by them. Usually, she tried to do the same, and usually, it worked. Usually.In the distance, with the sun sinking into the waters of the Pamlico Sound, the town of Buxton, with its white clapboard houses, looked like a postcard. She was staring toward the lighthouse, and just as she’d hoped, she saw a small herd of horses grazing in the sea oats around the base. There were maybe a dozen in total—tans and browns, mainly—and their coats were rough and wild, grown thick for the winter. Two foals stood together near the center, their tails swishing in unison.Lexie stopped to watch them, tucking her hands in her jacket pockets. It was getting cold now that the evening was coming, and she could feel the sting on her cheeks and nose. The air was bracing, and though she would have liked to stay longer, she was tired. It had been a long day, and felt even longer.Despite herself, she wondered what Jeremy was doing. Was he preparing to film again? Or deciding where to eat? Was he packing? And why did her thoughts constantly turn to him?She sighed, already knowing the answer. As much as she’d wanted to see the horses, the sight of them reminded her less of new beginnings than the simple fact that she was lonely. As much as she thought of herself as independent, as much as she tried to downplay Doris’s constant remarks, she couldn’t help but feel a yearning for companionship, for intimacy. It didn’t even have to be marriage; sometimes all she wanted was to look forward to Friday or Saturday night. She yearned to spend a leisurely morning lounging in bed with someone she cared about, and as impossible as the idea seemed, Jeremy was the one she kept picturing beside her.Lexie shook her head, forcing the thought away. In coming here, she had hoped to find relief from her thoughts, but as she stood near the lighthouse and watched the horses grazing, she felt the world bearing down hard. She was thirty-one, alone and living in a place without any prospects. Her grandfather and parents were nothing but memories, the state of Doris’s health was a source of constant worry to her, and the one man she’d found even remotely interesting in recent years would be gone forever by the time she returned home.That was when she started to cry, and for a long time, she found it difficult to stop. But just as she was finally beginning to collect herself, she saw someone approaching, and all she could do was stare when she realized who it was.

[Dalyia]

True BelieverFourteenLexie blinked, trying to make sure that what she was seeing was real. It couldn’t be him, because he couldn’t be here. The whole idea was so foreign, so unexpected, that she felt as if she were watching the scene through someone else’s eyes.Jeremy smiled as he set his satchel down. “You know, you really shouldn’t stare like that,” he said. “Men like women who know how to be subtle.”Lexie continued to watch him. “You,” she replied.“Me,” he agreed with a nod.“You’re . . . here.”“I am here,” he agreed again.She squinted at him in the waning light, and it occurred to Jeremy that she was even prettier than he remembered.“What are you . . . ?” She hesitated, trying to make sense of his appearance. “I mean, how did you . . . ?”“It’s kind of a long story,” he admitted. When she made no move toward him, he nodded at the lighthouse. “And this is the lighthouse where your parents were married?”“You remembered that?”“I remember everything,” he said, tapping his temple. “Little gray cells and all that. Where exactly were they married?”He spoke casually, as if this were the most ordinary of conversations, which only made everything feel even more surreal to her.“Over there,” she said, pointing. “On the ocean side, near the waterline.”“It must have been beautiful,” he said, gazing in that direction. “This whole place is beautiful. I can see why you love it here.”Instead of responding, Lexie took a long breath, trying to settle her turbulent emotions. “What are you doing here, Jeremy?”It was a moment before he answered. “I wasn’t sure you were coming back,” he said. “And I realized that if I wanted to see you again, the best option was to come to you.”“But why?”Jeremy continued staring toward the lighthouse. “It felt like I didn’t have a choice.”“I’m not sure what that means,” she said.Jeremy studied his feet, then looked up and smiled as if in apology. “To be honest, I’ve spent most of the day trying to figure it out, too.”As they stood near the lighthouse, the sun began to sink below the horizon, turning the sky a forbidding gray. The breeze, damp and cold, skimmed the surface of the sand, whipping up foam at the water’s edge.In the distance, a figure in a dark heavy jacket was feeding the seagulls, tossing scraps of bread into the air. As Lexie watched him, she could feel the shock of Jeremy’s appearance beginning to wear off. Part of her wanted to be angry that he’d ignored her desire to be alone, and yet another part, the greater part, was flattered that he’d come to find her. Avery had never bothered to come after her, nor had Mr. Renaissance. Even Rodney would never have thought of coming here, and until a few minutes ago, if someone had suggested that Jeremy would do such a thing, she would have laughed at the very notion. But it was beginning to dawn on her that Jeremy was different from anyone she’d met before, and that she shouldn’t be surprised by anything he did.The horses in the distance had begun to wander off, nibbling here and there as they moved back over the dune. The coastal mist was rolling in, merging sea and sky. Terns bobbed at the sand near the water’s edge, their long strawlike legs moving quickly as they searched for tiny crustaceans.In the silence, Jeremy cupped his hands and blew into them, trying to stop them from aching. “Are you angry that I came?” he finally asked.“No,” she admitted. “Surprised, but not angry.”He smiled, and she returned it with a flicker of her own.“How did you get here?” she asked.He motioned over his shoulder toward Buxton. “I got a ride from a couple of fishermen who were heading this way,” he said. “They dropped me off at the marina.”“They gave you a ride just like that?”“Just like that.”“You were lucky. Most fishermen are pretty tough characters.”“That may be true, but people are people,” he said. “While I’m not an expert in psychology, I’m of the opinion that anyone—even strangers—can sense the urgency of a request, and most people will usually do the right thing.” He stood straighter, clearing his throat. “But when that didn’t work, I offered to pay them.”She giggled at his admission.“Let me guess,” she said. “They took you to the cleaners, didn’t they?”He gave a sheepish shrug. “I suppose that depends on the perspective. It did seem like a lot of money for a boat ride.”“Naturally. That’s quite a trip. Just the gas alone would have been expensive. And then there’s the wear and tear on the boat . . .”“They mentioned that.”“And, of course, their time and the fact that they’ll be working tomorrow before dawn.”“They mentioned that, too.”In the distance, the last of the horses vanished over the dune. “But you came, anyway.”He nodded, as amazed as she was. “But they did make sure I understood it was a one-way trip. They didn’t intend to wait for me, so I guess I’m stuck here.”She raised an eyebrow. “Oh, really? How did you plan on getting back?”He gave an impish grin. “Well, I happen to know someone who’s staying out here, and I was planning on using my dazzling charm to convince her to give me a ride back home.”“And what if I’m not leaving for a while? Or if I just said you’re on your own?”“I didn’t figure that part out yet.”“And where did you intend to stay while you were out here?”“I haven’t figured that part out yet, either.”“At least you’re honest about it,” she said, smiling. “But tell me, what would you have done if I wasn’t here?”“Where else would you have gone?”She glanced away, liking the fact that he’d remembered this about her. In the distance, she saw the lights of a shrimp trawler moving so slowly it almost seemed stationary.“Are you hungry?” she asked.“I’m starved. I haven’t eaten anything all day.”“Would you like to have dinner?”“Do you know a nice place?”“I have a pretty good place in mind.”“Do they take credit cards?” he asked. “I used all my cash to get here.”“I’m sure,” she said, “that we’ll be able to work something out.”***Turning from the lighthouse, they made their way back down the beach, walking along the compact sand near the water’s edge. There was a space between them that neither seemed willing to cross. Instead, with their noses turning red in the chill, they moved steadily forward, as if pulled toward the place that both were meant to be.In the silence, Jeremy mentally replayed his journey here, feeling a pang of guilt about Nate and Alvin. He’d missed the conference call—there had been no reception at all as he was crossing the Pamlico Sound—and figured that he should probably call from the landline as soon as he was able, though he wasn’t looking forward to it. Nate, he suspected, had been revving up for hours and was waiting for Jeremy’s call so he could finally go ballistic, but Jeremy planned to suggest a meeting with the producers next week, complete with the footage and the outlines of the story, an idea that he suspected had been the whole point of the call, anyway. If that wasn’t enough to appease them, if missing a single call could end his career before it started, then he wasn’t sure he wanted to work in television.And Alvin . . . well, that was a little easier. There was no way Jeremy could get back to Boone Creek to meet Alvin tonight— he’d come to that realization by the time the boat had dropped him off—but Alvin had a cell phone, and he’d explain what was going on. Alvin wouldn’t be happy about having to work alone tonight, but he’d recover by tomorrow. Alvin was one of those rare people who never let anything bother them for more than a day.Yet, being honest with himself, Jeremy admitted that he didn’t really care about any of that now. Instead, all that seemed to matter was that he was walking with Lexie on a quiet beach in the middle of nowhere and that as they trudged into the salty breeze, she quietly looped her arm through his.***Lexie led the way up the warped wooden steps of the old bugalow and hung her jacket on the rack beside the door. Jeremy hung his as well, along with his satchel. As she walked ahead of him through the living room, Jeremy watched her, thinking again that she was beautiful.“Do you like pasta?” she asked, breaking into his thoughts.“Are you kidding? I grew up on pasta. My mother happens to be Italian.”“Good,” she said. “Because that’s what I planned on making.”“We’re eating here?”“I guess we have to,” she said over her shoulder. “You’re out of cash, remember?”The kitchen was small, with fading yellow paint, flowery wallpaper that was peeling in the corners, scuffed cabinets, and a small painted table set beneath the window. On the counters were the groceries she’d picked up earlier. Reaching into the first bag, she pulled out a box of Cheerios and a loaf of bread. From his spot near the sink, Jeremy saw a flash of her skin when she stood on her toes to put them in the cupboard.“Do you need a hand?” he asked.“No, I’ve got it, thanks,” she said, turning around. After straightening her shirt, she reached into another bag and set two onions off to the side, along with two large cans of San Marzano tomatoes. “But while I’m doing this, do you want something to drink? I have a six-pack of beer in the refrigerator if you’re interested.”He widened his eyes, feigning shock. “You have beer? I thought you didn’t drink much.”“I don’t.”“For someone who doesn’t drink, though, a six-pack can do a lot of damage.” He shook his head before going on. “If I didn’t know you better, I’d think you were planning to go on a bender this weekend.”She shot him a withering look, but, like yesterday, there was something playful in it. “It’s more than enough to get me through the month, thank you very much. Now, would you like one or not?”He smiled, relieved at their familiar exchange. “I’d love one, thanks.”“Would you mind getting it, though? I’ve got to get the sauce going.”Jeremy moved to the refrigerator and pulled two bottles of Coors Light from the six-pack. He twisted one cap off and then the other before setting a bottle before her. When she saw it, he shrugged. “I hate to drink alone,” he said.He raised his bottle in toast and she lifted hers as well. They clinked bottles without a word. Leaning against the counter beside her, he crossed one leg over the other. “Just to let you know, I’m pretty good at chopping if you need help.”“I’ll keep that in mind,” she said.He smiled. “How long has your family owned this place?”“My grandparents bought it right after World War II. Back then, there wasn’t even a road on the island. You had to drive across the sand to get here. There are some pictures in the living room of how this place looked back then.”“Would you mind if I took a look?”“Go ahead. I’m still getting things ready. There’s a bathroom down the hall if you want to wash up before dinner. In the guest bedroom on the right.”Moving to the living room, Jeremy examined the pictures of rustic shore life, then noticed Lexie’s suitcase near the couch. After debating for an instant, he grabbed it and headed down the hall. On the left, he saw an airy room with a large pedestal bed topped by a seashell-patterned comforter. The walls were decorated with additional photos portraying the Outer Banks. Assuming this was her room, he set her suitcase just inside the door.Crossing the hall, he entered the other room. It was nautical in theme, and the navy curtains provided a nice contrast to the wooden end tables and dresser. As he slipped off his shoes and socks at the foot of the bed, he wondered what it would be like to sleep in here while knowing Lexie was alone across the hall.At the bathroom sink, he peeked at himself in the mirror and used his hands in an attempt to get a semblance of control over his hair again. His skin was coated with a thin layer of salt, and after washing his hands, he splashed water on his face as well. Feeling somewhat better, he went back to the kitchen and heard the melancholy notes of the Beatles’ “Yesterday” coming from a small radio on the windowsill.“Ready for some help yet?” he asked. Beside her, he saw a medium-size salad bowl; in it were small chunks of tomatoes and olives.While rinsing the lettuce, Lexie nodded toward the onions. “I’m almost done with the salad, but would you mind taking the skin off those?”“Sure. Do you need me to dice them, too?”“No, that’s okay. Just take off the skins. The knife is in the drawer there.”Jeremy pulled out a steak knife, and reached for the onions on the counter. For a moment, they worked without speaking, listening to the music. As she finished with the lettuce and set it off to the side, Lexie tried to ignore how close they were standing together. But from the corner of her eye, she couldn’t help admiring Jeremy’s casual grace, along with the plane of his hips and legs, the broad shoulders, the high cheekbones.Jeremy held up a bald onion, oblivious to what she’d been thinking. “Like this?”“Just like that,” she said.“Are you sure you don’t want me to dice it?”“No. If you do, you’ll ruin the sauce, and I’ll never forgive you.”“Everyone dices the onions. My Italian mother dices the onions.”“Not me.”“So you’re just going to put these big round onions in the sauce?”“No. I’ll cut them in half first.”“Can I at least do that?”“No, thanks. I’d hate to put you out.” She smiled. “And besides, I’m the cook, remember? You just watch and learn. Right now think of yourself as . . . the prep boy.”He glanced at her. Since they’d come in from the cold, the rosiness in her cheeks had faded, leaving her skin with a fresh, natural glow.“The prep boy?”She shrugged. “What can I say? Your mom might have been Italian, but I grew up with a grandmother who tried just about every recipe out there.”“And that makes you an expert?”“No, but it made Doris one, and for a long time, I was the prep girl. I learned through osmosis and now it’s your turn.”He reached for the second onion. “Tell me, then, what’s so special about your recipe? Aside from having onions the size of baseballs, I mean.”She took the skinned onion and sliced it in half. “Well, since your mother was Italian, I’m sure you’ve heard of San Marzano tomatoes.”“Of course,” he said. “They’re tomatoes. From San Marzano.”“Ha, ha,” she said. “Actually, they’re the sweetest and most flavorful of all tomatoes, especially in sauces. Now, watch and learn.”She pulled out a pot from beneath the stove and set it off to the side, then turned on the gas and lit the fumes under the burner. The blue flame whooshed to life, and she set the empty pot on top of it.“I’m impressed so far,” he said, finishing the second onion and setting it aside. He picked up his beer and leaned against the counter again. “You should get your own cooking show.”Ignoring him, she poured both cans of tomatoes into the pot, then added a whole stick of butter to the sauce. Jeremy peeked over her shoulder, watching as the butter began to melt.“Looks healthy,” he said. “My doctor always told me I needed extra cholesterol in my diet.”“Did you know you have a tendency toward sarcasm?”“I’ve heard that,” he said, raising his bottle. “But thanks for noticing.”“Are you done with the other onion yet?”“I am the prep boy, aren’t I?” he said, handing it over.She split that one as well before adding all four halves to the sauce. Stirring for a moment with a long wooden spoon, she let it come to a boil, then set the heat on low.“Okay, then,” she said, satisfied, returning to the sink, “we’re done for now. It’ll be ready in an hour and a half.”As she washed her hands, Jeremy peeked into the saucepan, frowning. “That’s it? No garlic? No salt and pepper? No sausage? No meatballs?”She shook her head. “Three ingredients only. Of course, we’ll pour it over linguine and top it with some fresh-grated Parmesan cheese.”“This isn’t very Italian.”“Actually, it is. It’s the way they’ve made it in San Marzano for hundreds of years. That’s in Italy, by the way.” She turned the faucet off, shook her hands over the sink, and dried them on a dish towel. “But since we’ve got some time, I’m going to clean up before dinner,” she said. “Which means you’ll be on your own for a bit.”“Don’t worry about me. I’ll figure out something.”“If you’d like, you can take a shower,” she said. “I’ll set some towels out for you.”Still feeling the salt on his neck and arms, it took only an instant for him to agree. “Thanks. That would be great.”“Give me just a minute to set things up for you, okay?”She smiled and grabbed her beer as she squeezed past him, feeling his eyes on her hips. She wondered whether he was feeling as self-conscious as she was.At the end of the hall, she opened the closet door, grabbed a couple of towels, and put them on his bed. Beneath the sink in his bathroom were asssorted shampoos and a new bar of soap, and she set those out as well. As she did, she caught a reflection of herself in the mirror and had the sudden image of Jeremy wrapped in a towel after showering. The image made something jump inside. She drew a long breath, feeling like a teenager again.“Hello?” she heard him call. “Where are you?”“I’m in the bathroom,” she answered, amazed by how calm her voice sounded. “Just making sure you have everything you need.”He came up behind her. “You wouldn’t happen to have a disposable razor in any of those drawers, would you?”“No, sorry,” she said. “I’ll look in my bathroom, too, but . . .”“No big deal,” he said, running his hand over his whiskers. “I’ll just go with the scruffy look tonight.”Scruffy would be just fine, she decided, feeling herself blush. Turning away so he wouldn’t notice, she motioned to the shampoos. “Use whichever one you want,” she said. “And keep in mind that it takes a while for the hot water to come out, so just be patient.”“Will do,” he said. “But I did want to ask if it’s okay to use your phone. I have to make a couple of calls.”She nodded. “The phone’s in the kitchen.”Edging past him, she sensed him watching her again, though she didn’t turn around to check. Instead, she went to her room, closed the door behind her, and leaned against it, embarrassed at the foolish way she’d been feeling. Nothing had happened, nothing would happen, she told herself again. She locked the door, hoping it would be enough to block out her thoughts. And it worked, at least for a moment, until she noticed that he’d placed her suitcase in her room.Knowing that he’d been in here moments before gave her such a rush of forbidden anticipation that, even though she willed her mind blank, she had to admit that she’d been lying to herself all along.By the time Jeremy returned to the kitchen after his shower, he could smell the sauce as it simmered on the stove. He finished his beer, found the garbage can below the sink, and threw the bottle away, then got another from the fridge. On the shelf below, he saw a fresh block of Parmesan cheese and an unopened jar of Amfiso olives; he debated sneaking one before deciding against it.Locating the phone, he dialed Nate’s office number and was put through immediately. For the first twenty seconds, he held the receiver away from his ear while Nate went off the deep end, but when he finally calmed down, he reacted positively to Jeremy’s suggestion about the meeting next week. Jeremy ended the call with a promise to talk to him again tomorrow morning.Alvin, on the other hand, was impossible to reach. After dialing the number and getting his voice mail, Jeremy waited for a minute and tried again with the same result. The clock in the kitchen showed that it was almost six, and Jeremy figured that Alvin was somewhere on the highway. Hopefully, they’d have a chance to talk before he went out tonight.With nothing else to do and Lexie still nowhere in sight, Jeremy slipped out the back door and stood on the porch. The chill had deepened. The ever-increasing wind was cold and sharp, and though he couldn’t see the ocean, the waves rolled continuously, the sound rhythmic, lulling him into an almost trancelike state.In time, he headed back into the darkened living room. Peeking down the hall, he noted a sliver of light beneath Lexie’s closed door. Unsure of what to do next, he turned on a small reading lamp near the fireplace. With just enough light to spill shadows through the room, he perused the books that had been stacked on top of the mantel before remembering the satchel. In his haste to get here, he hadn’t looked at Doris’s notebook yet, and after pulling it out of the satchel, he carried it with him back to the easy chair. As he took his seat, he felt the tension in his shoulders begin to ease for the first time in hours.Now, this, he thought, was nice. No, change that. This felt like the way things always should be.Earlier, as she heard Jeremy close the door to his room, Lexie stood near the window and took a pull of her beer, glad she had something to calm her nerves.Both of them had kept their kitchen conversation superficial, keeping their distance until things were sorted out. She knew she should stay the course when she headed back out there, but as she set her beer aside, she realized that she didn’t want to keep her distance. Not anymore.Despite the knowledge of the risks, everything about him had drawn her closer—the surprise at seeing him walking toward her on the beach, his easy smile and tousled hair, the nervous, boylike gaze—and in that instant, he’d been both the man she knew and the man she didn’t. Though she hadn’t admitted it to herself then, she realized now that she wanted to know the part of him he’d kept hidden from her, whatever that might be and wherever it might lead.Two days ago, she would never have imagined something like this was possible, especially with a man she barely knew. She’d been hurt before, and she realized now that she’d reacted to the hurt by retreating into the safety of solitude. But a risk-free life wasn’t much of a life, really, and if she was going to change, she might as well start now.After showering, she sat on the edge of the bed as she unzipped the top pocket of her suitcase and retrieved a bottle of lotion. She applied some to her legs and arms, smoothing it over her breasts and belly, relishing the vibrant way it made her skin feel.She hadn’t brought anything fancy to wear; in her rush to get out in the morning, she’d grabbed the first things she could find, and she sorted through the suitcase until she found her favorite pair of jeans. Deeply faded, they were ripped at the knees and the cuffs were frayed. But the endless washing had softened and thinned the denim, and she was aware of how they accentuated her figure. She felt a secret thrill at her certainty that Jeremy would notice.She slipped into a long-sleeved white shirt, which she didn’t bother to tuck in, and rolled the sleeves up to her elbows. Standing in front of the mirror, she buttoned the front, stopping one button lower than she normally would, revealing the briefest glimpse of her cleavage.She dried her hair with a blow-dryer and ran a brush through it. For makeup, she did the best with what she had, applying a touch of blush to her cheeks, eyeliner, and lipstick. She wished she had some perfume, but there wasn’t anything she could do about that now.When she was ready, she tugged at her shirt in the mirror in an attempt to make it look just right, pleased with how she looked. Smiling, she tried to remember the last time looking good had really mattered to her.Jeremy was sitting in the chair with his feet propped up when she came into the room. He looked up at her, and for a moment, it seemed as if he wanted to say something, but no words came out. Instead, he just stared.Unable to look away from Lexie, he suddenly knew why it had been so important to find her again. He’d had no choice, for he knew then that he was in love with her.“You look . . . incredible,” he finally whispered.“Thank you,” she said, hearing the raw emotion in his voice and reveling in the way it made her feel. Their eyes met and held, and in that instant, she understood that the message in his gaze was mirroring her own.

[Dalyia]

True BelieverFifteenFor a moment, neither of them seemed able to move, until Lexie drew a long breath and glanced away. Still shaken, she raised her bottle slightly.“I think I need another one of these,” she said with a tentative smile. “Would you like one?”Jeremy cleared his throat. “I already got one. Thanks.”“I’ll be back in a minute. I should check on the sauce, too.”Lexie headed for the kitchen on unsteady legs, and she stopped before the stove. The wooden spoon had left a smudge of tomato sauce on the counter after she had picked it up to stir, and she put it in the same spot when she was finished. Then, opening the refrigerator, she took out another beer and set it on the counter, along with the olives. She tried to open the jar, but because her hands were trembling, she couldn’t get the grip she needed.“Need a hand with that?” Jeremy asked.She looked up, surprised. She hadn’t heard him come in, and wondered if her feelings were as obvious as they felt.“If you wouldn’t mind,” she said.Jeremy took the olives from her. She watched the sinewy muscles of his forearms as he twisted the cap off. Then, eyeing her beer, he opened that as well and handed it to her.He wouldn’t meet her eyes, nor did he seem to want to say anything more. In the stillness of the room, she watched him lean against the counter. The overhead light was on, but without the fading light of dusk streaming through the windows, it seemed softer than it had when they started cooking.Lexie took a mouthful of beer, savoring the taste, savoring everything about the evening: the way she looked and felt and the way he’d stared at her. She was close enough to reach out and touch Jeremy and for a fleeting moment almost did, but instead, she turned away and went to the cupboard.She took out some olive oil and balsamic vinegar and put some of each in a small bowl, along with salt and pepper.“Everything smells delicious,” he said.Finished with the dressing, she reached for the olives and put them into another small bowl. “We still have an hour before dinner,” she said. Talking seemed to keep her steadier. “Since I didn’t plan on having company, these will have to do for an appetizer. If it was summer, I’d say we could wait on the porch outside, but I tried that earlier and it’s freezing. And I should warn you that the chairs in the kitchen aren’t too comfortable.”“Which means?”“Would you like to go sit in the living room again?”He led the way, paused at the easy chair to pick up Doris’s book, then watched as Lexie took a seat on the couch. She put the olives on the coffee table, then shifted slightly trying to get comfortable. When he took a seat beside her, he could smell the sweet, floral scent of the shampoo she’d used. From the kitchen, he heard the faintest strains of the radio.“I see you have Doris’s notebook,” she said.He nodded. “She let me borrow it.”“And?”“I just had a chance to look over the first few pages. But it has a lot more detail than I thought it would.”“Now do you believe that she predicted the sex of all those babies?”“No,” he said. “Like I said, she might have recorded only the ones she was right about.”Lexie smiled. “And the different way the entries look? Sometimes pens, sometimes pencils, sometimes it looks like she was in a rush, sometimes she took her time.”“I’m not saying the book doesn’t look convincing,” he said. “I’m just saying that she can’t predict the sex of babies by holding someone’s hand.”“Because you say so.”“No. Because it’s impossible.”“Don’t you mean statistically improbable?”“No,” he said, “impossible.”“Fair enough, Mr. Skeptic. But how’s your story going?”Jeremy began picking at the label of his beer with his thumb. “Good,” he said. “If I can, I’d still like to finish looking through some of the diaries at the library, though. Maybe find something to spice up the story.”“Have you figured it out?”“Yes,” he said. “Now all I have to do is prove it. Hopefully, the weather will cooperate.”“It will,” she said. “It’s supposed to be foggy all weekend. I heard it on the radio earlier.”“Good,” he said. “But the bad part is that the solution isn’t nearly as much fun as the legend.”“Was it worth coming down, then?”He nodded. “Without a doubt,” he said, his voice quiet. “I wouldn’t have missed this trip for the world.”Hearing his tone, she knew exactly what he meant, and she turned toward him. Propping her chin on her hand, she put a leg on the couch, liking how intimate it felt, how desirable he made her feel.“So what is it?” she asked, leaning forward slightly. “Can you tell me the answer?”The lamplight behind her gave her the faintest halo, and her eyes glowed violet beneath dark lashes.“I’d rather show you,” he said.She smiled. “Since I’m bringing you back, anyway, you mean. Right?”“Right.”“And you want to go back . . . ?”“Tomorrow, if we can.” He shook his head, trying to regain control of his feelings, not wanting to ruin this, not wanting to push too hard, but wanting nothing more than to take her in his arms. “I’ve got to meet Alvin. He’s a friend of mine—a cameraman from New York. He’s coming to get some professional footage.”“He’s coming to Boone Creek?”“Actually, he’s probably arriving in town as we speak.”“Right now? Shouldn’t you be there?”“Probably,” he admitted.She thought about what he’d said, touched by the effort he had made to come today.“Okay,” she said. “There’s an early ferry we can catch. We can be back in town around ten.”“Thanks,” he said.“And you’re going to film tomorrow night?”He nodded. “I left a note telling Alvin to go to the cemetery tonight, but we have to film elsewhere, too. And tomorrow’s going to be a full day, anyway. There are some loose ends I have to tie up.”“What about the barn dance? I thought we had a deal that if you solved the mystery, I’d dance with you.”Jeremy lowered his head. “If I can make it, I will. Believe me. There’s nothing I want more.”Silence filled the room.“When are you going back to New York?” she finally asked.“Saturday,” he said. “I have to be in New York for a meeting next week.”Her heart sank at his words. Though she already knew it was coming, it still ached to hear him say it. “Back to the exciting life, huh?”He shook his head. “My life in New York isn’t all that glamorous. For the most part, it’s about work. I spend most of my time either researching or writing, and those are solitary endeavors. Actually, it can get pretty lonely at times.”She raised a brow. “Don’t try to make me feel sorry for you, because I’m not buying it.”He glanced at her. “What if I mentioned my creepy neighbors? Would you feel sorry for me then?”“No.”He laughed. “I don’t live in New York for the excitement, no matter what you might think. I live there because my family’s there, because I’m comfortable there. Because it’s home to me. Just like Boone Creek is home to you.”“I take it your family is close.”“Yeah,” he said, “we are. We get together almost every weekend at my mom and dad’s in Queens for these great big dinners. My dad had a heart attack a few years back and it’s tough on him, but he loves those weekends. It’s always a real zoo: a bunch of kids running around, Mom cooking in the kitchen, my brothers and their wives standing around in the backyard. Of course, they all live nearby, so they’re over there even more often than I am.”She took another drink, trying to picture the scene. “Sounds nice.”“It is. But it’s hard sometimes.”She looked at him. “I don’t understand.”He was quiet as he rotated the bottle in his hands. “Sometimes I don’t, either,” he said.Perhaps it was the way he said it that kept her from saying anything; in the silence, she watched him closely, waiting for him to continue.“Did you ever have a dream?” he asked. “Something you wanted so badly and just when you think you’re about to reach out and grab it, something else takes it away?”“Everyone has dreams that don’t come true,” she answered, her voice guarded.His shoulders slumped. “Yeah,” he said, “I guess you’re right.”“I’m not sure what you’re trying to tell me,” she said.“There’s something you don’t know about me,” he said, turning to face her again. “Actually, it’s something I’ve never told anyone.”At his words, she felt her shoulders tense. “You’re married,” she said, leaning back.He shook his head. “No.”“Then you’re seeing someone in New York and it’s serious.”“No, that’s not it, either.”When he said no more, she thought she saw a shadow of doubt cross his face.“It’s okay,” she offered. “It’s none of my business, anyway.”He shook his head and forced a smile. “You were close the first time,” he said. “I was married. And divorced.”Expecting far worse, she almost laughed aloud in relief, but his somber expression restrained her.“Her name was Maria. We were fire and ice at first, and no one could understand what we saw in each other. But once you got past the surface, we shared the same values and beliefs about all the big things in life. Including our desire for children. She wanted four, I wanted five.” He hesitated when he saw her expression. “I know that’s a lot of kids these days, but it was something we were both used to. Like me, she’d come from a large family.” He paused. “We didn’t know there was a problem right away, but after six months, she still wasn’t pregnant, and we went in for some routine tests. She turned out to be fine, but for whatever reason, it turned out that I wasn’t. No reason given, no answer possible. Just one of those things that sometimes happen to people. When she found out, she decided she didn’t want to stay in the marriage anymore. And now . . . I mean, I love my family, I love spending time with them, but when I’m there, I’m always reminded of the family that I’ll never be able to have. I know that sounds strange, but I guess you’d have to be me to understand how much I wanted kids.”When he finished, Lexie simply stared at him, trying to make sense of what he’d just told her. “Your wife left you because you found out that you couldn’t have kids?” she asked.“Not right away. But in the end, yes.”“And there was nothing the doctors could do?”“No.” He seemed almost embarrassed. “I mean, they didn’t say it was utterly impossible for me to have a child, but they made it clear that it would most likely never happen. And that was enough for her.”“What about adoption? Or finding a donor? Or . . .”Jeremy shook his head. “I know it’s easy to think she was heartless, but it wasn’t like that,” he said. “You had to know her to fully understand. She grew up thinking that she’d be a mother. After all, her sisters were all becoming mothers, and she would have been a mother, too, if it wasn’t for me.” He glanced up toward the ceiling. “For a long time, I didn’t want to believe it. I didn’t want to think I was defective, but I was. And I know it sounds ridiculous, but after that, I just felt like less of a man. Like I wasn’t worthy enough for anyone.”He shrugged, his voice growing more matter-of-fact as he went on. “Yeah, we could have adopted; yeah, we could have found a donor. I suggested all of that. But her heart wasn’t in it. She wanted to be pregnant, she wanted to experience childbirth, and it went without saying that she wanted it to be her husband’s. After that, things started going downhill. But it wasn’t just her. I changed, too. I was moody . . . I started traveling even more for my work . . . I don’t know . . . maybe I drove her away.”Lexie studied him for a long moment. “Why are you telling me all this?”He took a sip of his beer and scratched at the label on the bottle again. “Maybe it’s because I want you to know what you’re getting into with someone like me.”At his words, Lexie felt the blood rush to her cheeks. She shook her head and turned away.“Don’t say things you don’t mean.”“What makes you think I don’t mean them?”Outside, the wind began to pick up, and she heard the faint tones of the wind chime near the door.“Because you don’t. Because you can’t. Because it’s not who you are, and it has nothing to do with what you just told me,” she said. “You and I . . . we’re not the same, as much as you want to think we are. You’re there, I’m here. You have a big family that you see frequently, I only have Doris, and she needs me here, especially now, considering her health. You like cities, I like small towns. You have a career you love, and I . . . well, I have the library and I love that, too. If one of us is forced to change what we have, what we’ve chosen to make of our lives . . .” She closed her eyes briefly. “I know that’s possible for some people to do, but it’s a hard row to hoe when it comes to building a relationship. You said yourself that the reason you fell in love with Maria was because you shared the same values. But with us, one of us would have to sacrifice. And if I don’t want to have to sacrifice, I don’t think it’s fair to expect you to sacrifice, either.”She lowered her gaze, and in the ensuing stillness, he could hear the clock above the fireplace ticking. Her lovely face was clouded with sadness, and he was suddenly gripped by the fear that he might be losing any chance he had with her. Reaching over, he used his finger to turn her cheek toward him.“What if I don’t think it’s a sacrifice?” he said. “What if I tell you that I’d rather be with you than go back to my old life?”His finger felt electric against her skin. Trying to ignore the sensation, she held her voice steady.“Then I would tell you that I’ve had a wonderful time in the last couple of days, too. That meeting you has been . . . well, amazing. And that yes, I’d like to think that there was some way to make this work. And that I’m flattered.”“But you don’t want to try to make this work.”Lexie shook her head. “Jeremy . . . I . . .”“It’s okay,” he said, “I understand.”“No,” she said, “you don’t. Because you heard what I said, but you didn’t listen. It means that, of course, I’d like it to work between us. You’re intelligent and kind and charming . . .” She broke off, hesitating. “Okay, maybe you’re a little too forward at times . . .”Despite the tension, he couldn’t help laughing. She went on, choosing her words carefully.“The reason I’m saying this is that the last two days have been incredible, but I have things in my past that left me wounded, too,” she said. Quickly and calmly, she told him about Mr. Renaissance. When she finished, she looked almost guilty. “Maybe that’s why I’m trying to be practical about this. I’m not saying that you’ll disappear like he did, but can you honestly say that we’ll feel the same way about each other if we have to travel to spend time together?”“Yes,” he said, his voice firm. “I can.”She looked almost sad at his answer. “You can say that now, but what about tomorrow? What about a month from now?”Outside, the wind made a whistling sound as it moved around the cottage. Sand blew against the windows, and the curtains swayed as the air forced its way through the old panes.Jeremy stared at Lexie, realizing once again that he loved her.“Lexie,” he said, his mouth going dry. “I . . .”Knowing what he was going to say, she raised her hands to stop him. “Please,” she said. “Don’t. I’m not ready for that yet, okay? For now, let’s just enjoy dinner. Can we do that?” She hesitated before gently setting her bottle of beer on the table. “I should probably go check on it and get the linguine going.”With a sinking feeling, Jeremy watched as she rose from the couch. Pausing in the doorway of the kitchen, she turned around to face him.“And just so you know, I think what your ex-wife did was terrible and she’s nowhere near as great as you tried to make her out to be. You don’t leave your husband for something like that, and the fact that you can say anything kind about her at all says that she’s the one who made the mistake. Believe me—I’ve seen what it takes to be a good parent. Having kids means taking care of them, raising them, loving and supporting them, and none of those things have anything to do with who makes them one night in the bedroom or the experience of being pregnant.”She turned in the direction of the kitchen, vanishing from sight. He could hear Billie Holiday singing “I’ll Be Seeing You” on the radio. With his throat tightening, Jeremy rose to follow her, knowing that if he didn’t seize the moment, it might never come again. Lexie, he suddenly understood, was the reason he’d come to Boone Creek; Lexie was the answer he’d been looking for all along.He leaned against the doorway of the kitchen, watching as she set another pot on the stove.“Thank you for saying what you said,” he said.“You’re welcome,” she responded, refusing to meet his eyes. He knew she was trying to remain strong in the face of the same emotions he was experiencing, and he admired both her passion and her reserve. Yet he took a step toward her, knowing he had to take a chance.“Will you do me a favor?” he asked. “Since I might not make it tomorrow night,” he said, reaching out his hand, “would you mind dancing with me?”“Here?” She looked up, startled, her heart racing. “Now?”Without another word, he moved closer, taking her hand in his. He smiled as he raised her hand to his mouth and kissed her fingers before lowering it into position. Then, with his eyes locked on hers, he slipped his other arm around her back and gently pulled her toward him. As his thumb began to gently trace the skin of her hand and he whispered her name, she found herself beginning to follow his lead.The melody played softly in the background as they began to rotate in slow circles, and though she felt embarrassed at first, she finally leaned into him, relaxing into the warmth of his body. His breath warmed her neck, and as his hand tenderly skimmed her back, she closed her eyes and leaned further into him, dropping her head onto his shoulder and feeling the last of her resolve slip away. This, she realized, was what she had wanted all along, and in the tiny kitchen, they moved in rhythm to the gentle music, each of them lost in the other.Beyond the windows, the waves continued to roll, washing toward the dune. The cold wind whistled around the cottage, vanishing into the ever-blackening evening. Dinner simmered quietly on the stove.When at last she lifted her head to meet his eyes, he wrapped his arms around her. He brushed his lips against hers once, and then twice, before pressing them close. After pulling back slightly to make sure she was okay, he kissed her again, and she kissed him back, reveling in the strength of his arms. She felt his tongue against hers, the moisture intoxicating, and brought a hand to his face, tracing the stubble on his cheek. He responded to her touch by kissing her cheek and neck, his tongue hot against her skin.They kissed in the kitchen for a long time, both of them savoring the other without hurry or urgency, until Lexie finally pulled back. She turned off the burner behind her, then, taking his hand again, she led him back to her bedroom.They made love slowly. As he moved above her, he whispered how much he loved her and breathed her name like a prayer. His hands never stopped moving, as if proving to himself that she was real. They stayed in bed for hours, making love and laughing quietly, savoring each other’s touch.Hours later, Lexie rose from the bed and slipped into a bathrobe. Jeremy put on his jeans, and joining her in the kitchen, they finished cooking dinner. After Lexie had lit a candle, he stared at her over the small flame, marveling at the lingering flush of her cheeks, as he devoured the most delicious meal he’d ever tasted. For some reason, the act of eating together in the kitchen, him shirtless and her naked beneath the thin robe, seemed almost more intimate than anything else that had happened that night.Afterward, they went back to bed, and he pulled her close, content to simply hold her. When Lexie eventually fell asleep in his arms, Jeremy watched her sleep. Every now and then, he brushed the hair from her eyes, reliving the evening, remembering it all, and knowing in his heart that he’d met the woman with whom he wanted to spend the rest of his life.Just before dawn, Jeremy woke and realized that Lexie was gone. He sat up in bed, patted the covers as if to make sure, then hopped out of bed and put on his jeans. Her clothes were still on the floor, but the bathrobe she’d worn during dinner was gone. Snapping his jeans, he shivered slightly in the chill and crossed his arms as he made his way down the hall.He found her in the easy chair near the fireplace, a cup of milk on the small table beside her. In her lap was Doris’s notebook, opened near the beginning, but she wasn’t looking at it. Instead, she was gazing out the dark window toward nothing at all.He took another step toward her, the floorboards squeaking underfoot, and she started at the sound. When she saw him, she smiled.“Hey there,” she said.In the dim light, Jeremy sensed that something was wrong. Hesat on the armrest beside her and slipped his arm around her. “Are you okay?” he murmured. “Yeah,” she said, “I’m okay.” “What are you doing? It’s the middle of the night.” “I couldn’t sleep,” she said. “And besides, we have to be up in alittle while to catch the ferry.” He nodded, though he wasn’t completely satisfied by her answer. “Are you mad at me?” “No,” she said. “Are you sorry about what happened?” “No,” she said, “it’s not that, either.” She didn’t, however, addanything else, and Jeremy pulled her closer, trying to believe her. “It’s an interesting book,” he said, not wanting to press her. “I hope to spend a bit of time with it later.” Lexie smiled. “It’s been a while since I’ve looked through it.Seeing it here brings back memories.” “How so?” She hesitated, then pointed down at the open page in her lap.“When you were reading it earlier, did you get to this entry?” “No,” he answered. “Read it,” she said. Jeremy read the entry quickly; in many ways, it seemed identical to the others. The first names of the parents, the age, how far along the woman was in her pregnancy. And the fact that the woman would have a girl. When he finished, he looked at her.“Does it mean anything to you?” she asked.“I’m not sure what you’re asking,” he admitted.“The names Jim and Claire don’t mean anything to you?”“No.” He scrutinized her face. “Should they?”Lexie lowered her eyes. “They were my parents,” she said, hervoice quiet. “This is the entry that predicted I would be a girl.” Jeremy raised his eyebrows quizzically. “That’s what I was thinking about,” she said. “We think we know each other, but you didn’t even know the names of my parents. And I don’t know the names of your parents.”Jeremy felt a knot beginning to form in his stomach. “And that bothers you? That you don’t think we know each other that well?”“No,” she said. “What bothers me is that I don’t know if we ever will.”Then, with a tenderness that made his heart ache, she wrapped her arms around him. For a long time, they sat in the chair holding each other, both of them wishing they could stay in that moment forever.

[Dalyia]

True BelieverSixteenSo this is your friend, huh?” Lexie asked.She gestured discreetly to the holding cell. Although Lexie had lived in Boone Creek all her life, she’d never had the privilege of visiting the county jail—until today.Jeremy nodded. “He’s not normally like this,” he whispered back.Earlier in the morning, they had packed their belongings and closed up the beach cottage, each reluctant to leave it behind. But when they drove off the ferry in Swan Quarter, Jeremy’s cell phone picked up enough signal strength to retrieve his messages. Nate had left four of them about the upcoming meeting; Alvin, on the other hand, had left a frantic one saying that he’d been arrested.Lexie had dropped Jeremy off at his car, and he’d followed her back to Boone Creek, worried about Alvin, but worried about Lexie as well. Lexie’s disconcerting mood, which had started in the predawn darkness, had continued for the next few hours. Though she hadn’t pulled away when he slipped his arm around her on the ferry, she’d been quiet, gazing at the waters of the Pamlico Sound. When she smiled, it was only a flicker, and when he took her hand, she didn’t squeeze his. Nor would she talk about what she’d said to him earlier; strangely, she spoke instead about the numerous shipwrecks off the coast, and when he did try to steer the conversation toward more serious issues, she either changed the subject or didn’t answer at all.Meanwhile, Alvin was languishing in the county jail, looking—to Lexie’s eyes, at least—like he belonged there. Dressed in a black Metallica T-shirt, leather pants and jacket, and a studded wristband, Alvin was staring at them with wild eyes, his face flushed. “I mean, what the hell kind of a cracker town is this? Does anything normal ever happen here?” He’d been going on in this vein from the moment Lexie and Jeremy arrived, and his knuckles were white as he squeezed the iron bars. “Now, can you please get me out of here?”Behind them, Rodney stood scowling, his arms crossed, ignoring Alvin as he had been for the last eight hours. The guy whined way too much, and besides, Rodney was far more interested in Jeremy and Lexie. According to Jed, Jeremy hadn’t come back to his room last night, and Lexie hadn’t been at home, either. It could have been a coincidence, but he strongly doubted that, which meant they’d most likely spent the night together. Which wasn’t good at all.“I’m sure we’ll figure something out,” Jeremy said, not wanting to rile Rodney any further. He’d seemed downright angry when Jeremy and Lexie showed up. “Tell me what happened.”“What happened?” Alvin repeated, his voice rising. His eyes took on a crazed look. “You want to know what happened? I’ll tell you what happened! This whole place is nuts, that’s what happened! First, I get lost trying to find this stupid town. I mean, I’m driving down the highway, pass a couple of gas stations, and keep going, right? Since there doesn’t seem to be a town? And the next thing you know, I’m lost in the middle of a swamp for hours. I don’t find the town until almost nine o’clock. And then you’d think someone could give me directions to Greenleaf, right? I mean, how hard could it be? Small town, the only place to stay?Well, I get lost again! And that’s after some guy at the gas stationtalks my ear off for half an hour—”“Tully,” Jeremy said, nodding.“What?”“The guy you talked to.”“Yeah, whatever . . . so I finally get to Greenleaf, right? And the gigantic hairy guy there isn’t exactly friendly and sort of gives me the evil eye, hands me your note, and sticks me in this room with all these dead animals—”“All the rooms are like that.”“Whatever!” Alvin grunted. “And, of course, you’re not even around—”“Sorry about that.”“Would you let me finish?” Alvin hollered. “So, okay, I got your note and follow your directions to the cemetery, right? And I get there just in time to see the lights, and it’s fantastic, you know. Like for the first time in hours, I’m not pissed, right? So I head down to this place called Lookilu for a nightcap, which seems to be the only place in town open at that hour. And there’s only a couple of people in the whole place, so I get to talking to this gal named Rachel. And it’s going great. We’re really hitting it off, and then this guy walks in, looking like he just swallowed a porcupine . . .” He nodded toward Rodney. Rodney smiled without showing his teeth.“So, anyway, a little while later, I go out to my car, and the next thing I know this guy is tapping on my window with his flashlight and asking me to step out of the car. So I ask why, and he tells me again to get out. And then he starts asking me how much I’ve had to drink and that maybe I shouldn’t be driving. So I tell him I’m fine and that I’m here working with you, and the next thing I know I’m locked up for the night! Now, get me out of here!”Lexie looked over her shoulder. “Is that what happened, Rodney?”Rodney cleared his throat. “To a point. But he forgot the part where he called me a big dumb Barney Fife and said that he’d have me brought up on charges for harassment if I didn’t let him go. He seemed so irrational that I thought he might be on drugs or get violent, so I brought him in for his own safety. Oh, and he called me a stupid musclehead, too.”“You were harassing me! I didn’t do anything!”“You were drinking and driving.”“Two beers! I had two beers!” Alvin was looking maniacal again. “Check with the bartender! He’ll tell you!”“I already did,” Rodney said, “and he told me you had seven drinks.”“He’s lying!” Alvin shouted, his eyes swiveling to Jeremy. He looked through the bars, his face panicked between his hands. “I had two drinks! I swear, Jeremy! I would never drive if I had too much. I swear on my mother’s Bible!”Jeremy and Lexie looked over at Rodney. He shrugged. “I was just doing my job. ““Your job! Your job!” Alvin shouted. “Arresting innocent people! This is America and you can’t do that here! And this isn’t ending! When I get through with you, you won’t even be able to work security at Wal-Mart! Do you hear me, Barney! Wal-Mart!”It was clear that the two of them had been going on like this most of the night.“Let me talk to Rodney,” Lexie finally whispered.When she left with the deputy, Alvin fell silent.“We’ll get you out of here,” Jeremy reassured him.“I don’t belong in here in the first place!”“I know that. But you’re not helping yourself.”“He’s harassing me!”“I know that. But let Lexie handle it. She’ll take care of it.”Out in the hallway, Lexie looked up at Rodney. “What’s really going on?” she asked.Rodney wouldn’t meet her eyes; instead, he continued to look in the direction of the holding cell.“Where were you last night?” he asked.She crossed her arms. “I was at the cottage at the beach.”“With him?”Lexie hesitated, wondering about the best way to answer. “I didn’t go with him, if that’s what you’re asking.”Rodney nodded, knowing she hadn’t answered completely, but suddenly realizing he didn’t want to know any more.“Why did you arrest him? Honestly.”“I wasn’t planning to. He brought it on himself.”“Rodney . . .”He turned around, lowering his head to his chest.“He was hitting on Rachel, and you know how she can get when she drinks: all flirty and without a speck of common sense. I mean, I know it’s none of my business, but someone has to watch out for her.” He paused. “Anyway, when he was leaving, I went over to talk to this guy to see if he was planning to head over to her place and what kind of guy he was and he starts insulting me. And I wasn’t in the best of moods, anyway . . .”Lexie knew the reason for that, and when Rodney trailed off, she said nothing. In time, Rodney shook his head, as if he were still trying to justify it to himself. “But the fact is, he was drinking and planning on driving. And that’s illegal.”“Was he over the legal limit?”“I don’t know. I never bothered to check.”“Rodney!” she whispered loudly.“He made me angry, Lexie. He’s rude and weird-looking and hitting on Rachel and calling me names, then he says he’s working with this guy . . .” He motioned with his head toward Jeremy.Lexie laid a hand on his shoulder. “Listen to me, okay? You know that you will get in trouble if you keep him in here for no reason. Especially with the mayor. If he finds out what you did to the cameraman—especially after he’s gone through all this trouble to make sure the story turns out okay—he’ll cause trouble for you.” She let that sink in for a moment before going on. “And besides, you and I both know that the sooner you let him out, the sooner the both of them can leave.”“You really think he’ll leave?”Lexie looked Rodney in the eye. “His flight is tomorrow.”For the first time, Rodney held her gaze. “Are you going with him?”It took a moment for her to answer the question she’d been asking herself all morning. “No,” she whispered. “Boone Creek is my home. And this is where I’m staying.”Ten minutes later, Alvin was walking out to the parking lot beside Jeremy and Lexie. Rodney was standing in the doorway of the county jail, watching them go.“Don’t say anything,” Jeremy warned again, keeping hold of Alvin’s arm. “Just keep walking.”“He’s a hick with a gun and a badge!”“No, he isn’t,” Lexie said, her voice firm. “He’s a good guy no matter what you might think.”“He arrested me for no reason!”“And he also watches out for people who live here.”They reached the car, and Jeremy motioned for Alvin to get in the backseat.“This isn’t the end of this,” Alvin grumbled, crawling in. “I’m calling the D.A. That guy should be fired.”“The best thing you can do is forget about it,” Lexie said, looking through the open car door at him.“Forget about it? Are you insane? He was wrong and you know it!”“Yes, he was. But since no charges were filed, you’ll let it go, anyway.”“Who are you to tell me what to do?”“I’m Lexie Darnell,” she said, drawling out her name. “And not only am I a friend of Jeremy’s, but I have to live here with Rodney, and I’m not lying when I say that I feel a lot safer with him around. Everyone in town feels safer because of him. You, on the other hand, are leaving tomorrow, and he’s not going to bother you again.” She smiled. “And c’mon, you have to admit that this will make one heck of a story when you get back to New York.”He stared at her in disbelief before glancing at Jeremy. “She’s the one?” he asked.Jeremy nodded.“She’s pretty,” Alvin commented. “Maybe a little on the pushy side, but pretty.”“Better yet, she cooks like an Italian.”“As good as your mom?”“Maybe better.”Alvin nodded, silent for a moment. “I take it you think she’s right about dropping this whole thing.”“I do. She understands this place better than you or me, and she hasn’t led me wrong yet.”“So she’s smart, too, huh?”“Very,” Jeremy said.Alvin broke into a wolfish grin. “I take it you two were together last night.”Jeremy said nothing.“She must be really something . . .”“I’m right here, you guys!” Lexie finally interjected. “You do realize that I can hear everything you’re saying.”“Sorry,” Jeremy said. “Old habits and all that.”“Can we go now?” Lexie asked.Jeremy looked at Alvin, who seemed to be considering his options.“Sure,” he said with a shrug. “And not only that, I’ll forget any of this ever happened. On one condition.”“What’s that?” Jeremy asked.“All this talk about Italian food has made me hungry, and I haven’t eaten since yesterday. Buy me lunch, and not only will I drop the whole thing, but I’ll tell you how the filming came out last night, too.”Rodney watched them go before heading back inside, tired from lack of sleep. He knew he shouldn’t have arrested the guy, but even so, he didn’t feel too bad about it. All he’d wanted to do was exert a little pressure, and the guy starts running his mouth and acting all uppity . . .He rubbed the top of his head, not wanting to think about it. It was over now. What wasn’t over was the fact that Lexie and Jeremy had spent the night together. Suspicions were one thing, but proof was another, and he saw the way they were acting this morning. It was different somehow from the way they’d been acting at the party the other night, which meant something had changed between them. Still, he hadn’t been completely certain about them until he heard the tricky way she’d tried to answer without answering. I didn’t go with him, if that’s what you’re asking. No, he’d wanted to say, he hadn’t asked her that. He’d asked if she’d been at the beach with Jeremy last night. But her vague response was enough, and it didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out what happened.The realization nearly broke his heart, and he wished again that he understood her better. There’d been times in the past when he thought he was getting closer to knowing what made her tick, but this . . . well, this just proved otherwise, didn’t it? Why on earth would she let it happen again? Why hadn’t she learned from the first traveling stranger who’d passed through town? Didn’t she remember how depressed she’d been afterward? Didn’t she know she was only going to be hurt again?She had to know those things, he thought, but she must have decided—at least for an evening, anyway—that she didn’t care. It made no sense at all, and Rodney was getting tired of caring about it. He was tired of being hurt by her. Yeah, he still loved her, but he’d given her more than enough time to figure out her own feelings for him. It was time, he thought, for Lexie to make a decision one way or the other.His anger fading, Alvin paused in the doorway of Herbs when he saw Jed sitting at one of the tables. Jed scowled and crossed his arms as soon as he saw Alvin, Jeremy, and Lexie take their seats at a booth near the front windows.“Our friendly concierge doesn’t seem too pleased to see us,” Alvin whispered across the table.Jeremy stole a glance at him. Jed’s eyes became little slits. “Gee, that’s strange. He’s always seemed so friendly before. You must have done something to upset him.”“I didn’t do anything. I just checked in.”“Maybe he doesn’t like the way you look.”“What’s wrong with the way I look?”Lexie raised her eyebrows as if to say, You’ve got to be kidding.“I don’t know,” Jeremy pondered out loud. “Maybe he doesn’t like Metallica.”Alvin glanced at his shirt and shook his head. “Whatever,” he said.Jeremy winked at Lexie; while she smiled in return, her expression was distant, as if her mind was elsewhere.“The filming went great last night,” Alvin said, reaching for a menu. “Caught it all from two angles and watched it on playback last night. Amazing stuff. The networks are going to love it. Which reminds me, I’ve got to call Nate. Since he couldn’t reach you, he kept calling me all afternoon instead. I have no idea how you put up with that guy.”When Lexie looked perplexed, Jeremy leaned toward her. “He’s talking about my agent,” he said.“Is he coming down, too?”“No. He’s too busy dreaming up my future career. And besides, he wouldn’t know what to do outside the city. He’s the kind of guy who thinks Central Park should be developed into condos and retail outlets.”She flashed a quick smile.“So what’s with you two?” Alvin demanded. “How did you meet?”When Lexie showed no inclination to answer, Jeremy shifted in his seat.“She’s a librarian and she’s been helping me research the story,” he said vaguely.“And you two have been spending quite a bit of time together, huh?”From the corner of his eye, Jeremy saw Lexie glance away.“There’s been a lot to research,” he said.Alvin looked at his friend, sensing that something was off. It seemed almost as if they’d had a lovers’ quarrel and gotten over it but were still licking their wounds. Which was a lot to have happen in a single morning.“Well . . . good,” he said, deciding to drop it for now. Instead, he looked over the entries as Rachel came sauntering toward the table.“Hey, Lex, hey, Jeremy,” she said as she approached. “Hey, Alvin.”Alvin looked up. “Rachel!” he said.“I thought you told me you were coming in for breakfast,” she said. “I’d just about given up on you.”“I’m sorry about that,” he said. He glanced at Jeremy and Lexie. “I guess I slept in.”Reaching into her apron, Rachel pulled out a small pad and retrieved the pencil she kept behind her ear. She dabbed the tip with her tongue. “Now, what can I get y’all?”Jeremy ordered a sandwich; Alvin asked for the lobster bisque and a sandwich as well. Lexie shook her head. “I’m not that hungry,” she said. “But is Doris around?”“No, she didn’t come in today. She was tired and decided to take the day off. She worked late last night getting things ready for the weekend.”Lexie tried to read her expression.“Really, Lex,” Rachel added, her voice serious. “There’s nothing to worry about. She sounded fine on the phone.”“Maybe I should go check on her, anyway,” Lexie said. She looked around the table for confirmation before rising. Rachel moved aside to make room.“Would you like me to come with you?” Jeremy asked.“No, that’s okay,” she said. “You’ve got work to do, and I’ve got things to do, too. Would you like to meet up at the library later? You wanted to finish looking through the diaries, didn’t you?”“If that’s okay,” he said, stung by the nonchalance in her tone. He would rather have spent the rest of the afternoon with her.“How about if I meet you there at four?” she suggested.“That’s fine,” he said. “But let me know what’s going on, okay?”“Like Rachel said, I’m sure she’s fine. But I’m going to grab her notebook from the backseat, if that’s okay.”“Yeah, of course.”She looked at Alvin. “Nice meeting you, Alvin.”“You, too.”A moment later, Lexie was gone and Rachel was on her way back to the kitchen. As soon as they were out of earshot, Alvin leaned across the table.“Okay, my friend, spill it.”“What do you mean?”“You know exactly what I’m talking about. First you fall for her. Then you spend the night together. But when you show up at the jail, you both act like you barely know each other. And just now she makes the first excuse she can to get out of here.”“Doris is her grandmother,” Jeremy explained, “and Lexie worries about her. She’s not in the best of health.”“Whatever,” Alvin said, clearly skeptical. “My point is, you’ve been staring at her like a lonely puppy dog, and she’s been doing her best to pretend you aren’t. Did you two have a fight or something?”“No,” he said. He paused, glancing around the restaurant. At the corner table, he saw three members of the town council, as well as the elderly volunteer from the library. They all waved at him. “Actually, I don’t know what it was. One minute everything was great, and then later . . .”When he didn’t continue, Alvin leaned back in the booth. “Yeah, well, it wasn’t going to last, anyway.”“It might have,” Jeremy insisted.“Oh, yeah? What? Were you planning to move down here to the Twilight Zone? Or is she coming to New York?”Jeremy folded and refolded his napkin without answering, not wanting to be reminded of the obvious.In the silence, Alvin raised his eyebrows. “I definitely have to spend more time with this lady,” he said. “I haven’t seen someone get under your skin like this since Maria.”Jeremy looked up wordlessly, knowing that his friend was right.Doris was lying propped up in bed, looking over her reading glasseswhen Lexie peeked in her bedroom door.“Doris?” Lexie asked.“Lexie,” she cried, “what are you doing here? Come in, come in . . .”Doris set aside the open book in her lap. She was still in her pajamas, and though her skin had a slightly grayish cast, she looked otherwise okay.Lexie crossed the room. “Rachel said you stayed home today, and I just wanted to check on you.”“Oh, I’m fine. Just a little off today, that’s all. But I thought you were supposed to be at the beach.”“I was,” she said, taking a seat on the edge of the bed. “But I had to come back.”“Oh?”“Jeremy showed up,” she said.Doris raised her hands as if in surrender. “Don’t blame me. I didn’t tell him where you were. And I didn’t tell him to go looking for you, either.”“I know.” Lexie gave Doris’s arm a reassuring squeeze.“Then how did he know where to find you?”Lexie brought her hands together in her lap. “I told him the other day about the cottage, and he put two and two together. You can’t believe how surprised I was when I saw him walking up the beach.”Doris eyed Lexie carefully before sitting up a little straighter. “So . . . you two were at the beach house last night?”Lexie nodded.“And?”Lexie didn’t answer right away, but after a moment, her lips formed a small smile. “I made him your famous tomato sauce.”“Oh?”“He was impressed,” she said. Lexie ran her hand through her hair. “I brought your notebook back, by the way. It’s in the living room.”Doris slipped off her reading glasses and began wiping the lenses with the corner of her sheet. “None of this explains why you’re back, though.”“Jeremy needed a ride. A friend from New York—a cameraman—came down to film the lights. They’re going to film tonight, too.”“What’s his friend like?”Lexie hesitated, thinking about it. “He looks like a cross between a punk rocker and a motorcycle gang member, but other than that . . . he’s okay.”When she grew silent, Doris reached over and took Lexie’s hand. Squeezing it gently, she studied her granddaughter.“Do you want to talk about why you’re really here?”“No,” Lexie answered, tracing the seams of Doris’s quilt with her finger. “Not really. This is something I have to figure out on my own.”Doris nodded. Lexie always put on a brave front. At times, she knew it was best to say nothing at all.

[Dalyia]

True BelieverSeventeenJeremy glanced at his watch as he stood on the porch at Herbs, waiting for Alvin to finish his conversation with Rachel. Alvin was giving it his best shot, and Rachel seemed to be in no rush to say good-bye, which normally would have been considered a good omen. Yet, to Jeremy’s eye, Rachel seemed less interested in Alvin than in simply being polite, and Alvin wasn’t reading her cues. Then again, Alvin always had trouble reading cues.When Alvin and Rachel finally parted, Alvin joined Jeremy, a big grin on his face, as if he’d already forgotten about the events of last night. Which he probably had.“Did you see that?” he whispered when he was close. “I think she likes me.”“What’s not to like?”“Exactly my point,” he agreed. “Man, she’s something. I love the way she talks. It’s so . . . sexy.”“You think everything is sexy,” Jeremy observed.“That’s not true,” he protested. “Only most things.”Jeremy smiled. “Well, maybe you’ll see her tonight at the dance. We might be able to drop in before we head out to film again.”“There’s a dance tonight?”“At the old tobacco barn. I hear the whole town turns out. I’m sure she’ll be there.”“Good,” Alvin said, stepping off the porch. But then, almost to himself, he added, “I wonder why she didn’t mention it.”Rachel absently leafed through her order tickets, as she watched Alvin leave the restaurant with Jeremy.She’d been a little standoffish when he first took a seat beside her at Lookilu, but once he mentioned what he was doing in town and that he knew Jeremy, they struck up a conversation, and he spent most of the next hour telling her about New York. He made it sound like paradise itself, and when she mentioned that she hoped to take a trip there someday, he’d scribbled his phone number on the cover of her notepad and said to give him a call. He’d even promised to get her tickets to the Regis and Kelly show if she wanted.As flattering as the gesture was, she knew she wouldn’t call. She’d never been too keen on tattoos, and though she hadn’t had much luck with men over the years, she had long made it a point never to date someone who had more piercings in his ear than she did. But that wasn’t her only reason for her lack of interest, she had to admit; Rodney also had something to do with it.Rodney often visited the Lookilu to make sure that no one would try to drive while inebriated, and pretty much everyone who spent any time there knew there was a chance that he’d be dropping in sometime during the night. He’d move around the bar, say hello to various folks, and if he got the feeling that you were too far gone, he’d let you know what he was thinking and mention that he’d be watching for your car later. While it sounded intimidating—and probably was if you were drinking too much—he’d also add that he’d be happy to drive you home. It was his way of keeping drunks off the road, and in the past four years, he hadn’t needed to make a single arrest. Even the owner of the Lookilu didn’t mind him coming in anymore; oh, he’d moaned about the thought of a deputy patrolling the lounge in the beginning, but since no one seemed to mind, he’d gradually come to accept it, and he’d even begun calling Rodney when he thought there was someone in the bar who needed a ride.Last night, Rodney had come in like he always did, and it didn’t take long for him to spot Rachel sitting at the bar. In the past, he usually smiled and would come over to visit, but this time, when he saw her with Alvin, there was a moment when she thought he looked almost hurt. It was an unexpected reaction, but almost as quickly as it appeared, it passed, and all of a sudden, he looked angry. In a way, it seemed almost as if he were jealous, and she supposed that was the reason she left the bar right after he did. During the ride home, she kept replaying the scene, trying to figure out if she’d really seen what she had, or whether she’d simply been imagining it. Later, when she was lying in bed, she concluded that she wouldn’t have been upset at all if Rodney had been jealous.Maybe, she thought, there was hope for them yet.After picking up Alvin’s car, which had remained parked on the street near Lookilu, Jeremy and Alvin drove to Greenleaf. Alvin took a quick shower, Jeremy threw on a change of clothes, and the two of them spent the next couple of hours going over what Jeremy had learned. For Jeremy, it was a method of escape; concentrating on work was the only way he knew to keep himself from worrying about Lexie.Alvin’s tapes were as extraordinary as he’d promised, especially when compared with the ones Jeremy had shot. Their clarity and crispness, combined with slow-motion playback, made it easy to pick out details that Jeremy had missed in the rush of the moment. Even better, there were a few frames that Jeremy could isolate and freeze, which he knew would help viewers understand what was actually being shown.From there, Jeremy walked Alvin through the historic time line using the references he’d found to interpret what was being seen. But as Jeremy continued to lay out the proof in intricate detail— all three versions of the legend; maps, notes on quarries, water tables, and schedules; various construction projects; and the detailed aspects of refracted light—Alvin began to yawn. He’d never been interested in the nitty-gritty of Jeremy’s work, and he finally convinced Jeremy to drive him across the bridge to the paper mill so he could see the place himself. They spent a few minutes looking around the yard, watching timber being loaded onto platforms, and on their way back through town, Jeremy pointed out where they’d be filming later. From there, they headed to the cemetery so Alvin could get some footage during the daytime.Alvin set up the camera in various locations while Jeremy paced on his own, the stillness of the cemetery forcing his thoughts back to Lexie and his worries about her. He remembered their night together and tried once again to understand what had made her rise from the bed in the middle of the night. Despite her denials, he knew she was feeling regret, maybe even remorse, about what had happened, but even that didn’t make sense to him.Yes, he was leaving, but he’d told her repeatedly that they would find a way to make it work. And yes, it was true that they didn’t know each other well, but considering the short time they’d been together, he’d learned enough to know that he could love her forever. All they needed was a chance.But Alvin, he thought, had been right. Whatever her concerns about Doris, her behavior this morning suggested that she’d been looking for an excuse to get away from him. What he wasn’t sure of, however, was whether it was because she loved him and thought it would be easier to distance herself from him now, or because she didn’t love him and didn’t want to spend more time with him.Last night, he’d been sure that she felt the same way that he did. But now . . .He wished they could have spent the afternoon together. He wanted to hear her concerns and alleviate them; he wanted to hold her and kiss her and convince her that he would find a way to make their relationship work, no matter how hard that might be. He wanted to make her hear his words: that he couldn’t imagine a life without her, that his feelings for her were real. But most of all, he wanted to reassure himself that she felt the same way about him.In the distance, Alvin was hauling the camera and tripod to another location, lost in his own world and oblivious to Jeremy’s worries. Jeremy sighed before realizing that he’d drifted to the part of the cemetery where Lexie had vanished from sight the first time he saw her here.He hesitated for a moment, a hunch taking root in his mind, then began searching the grounds, pausing every few steps. It took only a few minutes until he spotted the obvious. Making his way over a small ridge, he stopped at the foot of an untamed azalea bush. Twigs and branches surrounded it, but the area in front seemed to have been tended to. Squatting down, he reset the flowers she must have been carrying in her bag, and he suddenly understood why neither Doris nor Lexie wanted people trampling through the cemetery.In the gray light, he stared at the graves of Claire and James Darnell, wondering why he hadn’t figured it out before.On the way back from the cemetery, Jeremy dropped Alvin off at Greenleaf for a nap, then returned to the library, rehearsing what he wanted to say to Lexie.He noticed the library was more crowded than usual, at least on the outside. People were milling on the sidewalk in groups of two or three, pointing upward and gazing at the architecture, as if getting an early jump on the Historic Homes Tour. Most seemed to be holding the same brochure that Doris had sent Jeremy and were reading aloud from the captions highlighting the unique properties of the building.Inside, the staff seemed to be preparing as well. A number of volunteers were sweeping and dusting; two others were setting out additional Tiffany lamps, and Jeremy assumed that once the official tour began, the overhead lights would be dimmed to give the library a more historic atmosphere.Jeremy walked past the children’s room, noting that it looked far less cluttered than it had the other day, and continued up the stairs. Lexie’s office door was open, and he paused for a moment to collect himself before entering. Lexie was bending down near the desk, which had been nearly cleared. Like everyone else in the library, she was doing her best to get rid of clutter, stacking various piles under the desk.“Hey,” he said.Lexie looked up. “Oh, hey,” she said, standing. She smoothed her blouse. “I guess you caught me making the place look presentable.”“You do have a big weekend on tap.”“Yeah, I suppose I should have taken care of this earlier,” she said, motioning around the room, “but I guess I’ve picked up a nasty case of procrastination.”She smiled, beautiful even in her slight dishevelment.“It happens to the best of us,” he said.“Yeah, well, not usually to me.” Instead of moving toward him, she reached for another pile, then ducked her head beneath the desk again.“How’s Doris doing?” he inquired.“Fine,” she said, speaking from below the desk. “Like Rachel said, she’s just a little under the weather, but she’ll be up and about tomorrow.” Lexie reappeared, reaching for another stack of papers. “If you get the chance, you might swing by before you head out. I’m sure she’d appreciate that.”For a moment, he simply watched her, but when he realized the implication of what she was saying, he took a step toward her.As he did, Lexie moved around the desk, acting as if she hadn’tnoticed, but making sure to keep the desk between them.“What’s going on?” he asked.She shuffled a few more items on her desk. “I’m just busy,” she answered.“I meant what’s going on with us,” he said.“Nothing,” she said. Her voice was neutral, as if discussing the weather.“You won’t even look at me,” he said.With that, she finally looked up, meeting his eyes for the first time. He could sense her simmering hostility, though he wasn’t sure whether she was mad at him or mad at herself. “I don’t know what you want me to say. I’ve already explained that I’ve got things to do. Believe it or not, I am in sort of a rush here.”Jeremy stared without moving, suddenly sensing that she was looking for any excuse to start an argument.“Is there anything I can do to help?” he asked.“No, thanks. I’ve got it.” Lexie slipped another stack under the desk. “How was Alvin?” she asked, her voice rising from below.Jeremy scratched the back of his head. “He’s not mad anymore, if that’s what you’re asking.”“Good,” she said. “Did you two get your work done?”“For the most part,” he said.She popped up again, trying to appear rushed. “I pulled the diaries out for you again. They’re on the desk in the rare-book room.”Jeremy gave a weak smile. “Thanks,” he said.“And if you can think of anything else that you might need before you leave,” she added, “I’ll be here for at least another hour or so. The tour starts at seven, though, so you should plan on being out of here no later than six-thirty, since that’s when we turn off the overhead lights.”“I thought the rare-book room closed at five.”“Since you’re leaving tomorrow, I figured I could relax the rules just this once.”“And because we’re friends, right?”“Sure,” she said. She smiled automatically. “Because we’re friends.”Jeremy left the office and made his way to the rare-book room, replaying the conversation in his head and trying to make sense of it. Their meeting hadn’t gone as he’d hoped. Despite the flippancy of her final comment, he hoped that she would follow him, but somehow knew she wouldn’t. The afternoon apart hadn’t helped to mend things between them; if anything, they’d gotten worse. If she seemed distant before, she now seemed to view him as radioactive.As much as her behavior bothered him, on some level he knew it made sense. Maybe she shouldn’t have been quite so . . . cold about it, but everything came back to the fact that he lived in New York and she lived here. Yesterday at the beach, it had been easy to fool himself with the belief that things would magically work out between them. And he had believed it. That was the thing. When people cared about each other, they always found a way to make it work.He realized he was getting ahead of himself, but that’s what he did when confronted with a problem. He looked for solutions, he made suppositions, he tried to analyze long-term scenarios, in order to carefully assess the potential outcomes. And, he supposed, that’s what he expected of her as well.What he didn’t expect was to be treated like a pariah. Or for her to act as if nothing had happened between them at all. Or to act as if she believed that last night had been a mistake.

[Dalyia]

True BelieverNineteenJeremy slept poorly on his last night at Greenleaf. He and Alvin had finished up filming—as the train passed, Riker’s Hill only faintly registered the reflected light—and after viewing the film, both he and Alvin had decided it was good enough to prove Jeremy’s theory, unless they were willing to arrange for better equipment.Still, on their way back to Greenleaf, Jeremy’s mind was barely on the mystery or even the drive. Instead, he began to once again replay the last few days in his head. He remembered the first time he’d seen Lexie in the cemetery, and their spirited exchange in the library. He thought of their lunch on Riker’s Hill and their visit to the boardwalk, recalled his amazement at the extraordinary party in his honor, and how he’d felt when he first glimpsed the lights in the cemetery. But most of all, he remembered those moments when he first began to realize that he was falling in love with her.Was it really possible for so much to have happened in only a couple of days? By the time he’d reached Greenleaf and entered his room, he was trying to pinpoint the exact moment when everything started going wrong. He wasn’t quite sure, but it seemed to him now that she’d been trying to run away from her feelings, not simply from him. So when had she begun to realize that she had feelings for him? At the party, like him? At the cemetery? Earlier that afternoon?He had no idea as to the answer. All he knew was that he loved her and that he couldn’t imagine never seeing her again.The hours passed slowly; with his flight leaving from Raleigh at noon, he would be leaving Greenleaf shortly. He rose before six, finished packing his things, and loaded them in his car. After making sure that he saw Alvin’s light shining from his own room, he made his way through the chilly morning air to the office.Jed, as he expected, scowled. His hair was even more unkempt than usual and his clothing wrinkled, so Jeremy figured he must have risen only a few minutes earlier. Jeremy set the key on his desk.“Quite a place you have here,” Jeremy said. “I’ll make sure to recommend it to my friends.”If possible, Jed’s expression grew even meaner, but Jeremy merely smiled ingratiatingly in return. On his way back to the room, he saw headlights bouncing in the fog as a car slowly made its way up the gravel drive. For an instant, he thought it was Lexie, and he felt a surge in his chest; when the car finally came into view, his hopes sank just as quickly.Mayor Gherkin, bundled in a heavy jacket and scarf, emerged from the car. Showing none of the energy he had at their previous meetings, he groped his way toward Jeremy in the darkness.“Packing up, I suppose,” he called out.“I just finished.”“Jed didn’t slap you with the bill, did he?”“No,” Jeremy said. “Thanks for that, by the way.”“You’re welcome. Like I said, it was the least we could do for you. I just hope you enjoyed your stay in our fine town.”Jeremy nodded, noting the worry on the mayor’s face. “Yeah,” he said, “I did.”For the first time since Jeremy had met him, Gherkin seemed at a loss for words. As the silence grew uncomfortable, he retuckedthe scarf into his jacket. “Well, I just wanted to drop by to tell you that the folks around here sure enjoyed meeting you. I know I’m speaking for the town here, but you’ve made quite an impression.” Jeremy put his hands in his pockets. “Why the ruse?” he asked.Gherkin sighed. “About adding the cemetery to the tour?”“No. I mean about the fact that your father recorded the answer in his diary and that you hid the answer from me.”A sad expression crossed Gherkin’s features. “You’re absolutely right,” he said after a moment. His voice was hesitant. “My daddy did solve that mystery, but I suppose he was meant to.” He met Jeremy’s eyes. “Do you know why he became so interested in the history of our town?”Jeremy shook his head.“In World War II, my daddy was serving in the army with a man named Lloyd Shaumberg. He was a lieutenant, my daddy was a grunt. People these days don’t seem to realize that during the war, it wasn’t just soldiers out there on the front lines. Most of the people serving were just regular folks: bakers, butchers, mechanics. Shaumberg was a historian. At least that’s how my daddy referred to him. Actually, he was just a history teacher at a high school in Delaware, but my daddy swore there was no finer officer in the army. He used to keep his men entertained by telling stories from the past, stories that hardly anybody knew, and it kept my daddy from being so scared about what was happening. Anyway, after the push up the boot in Italy, Shaumberg and my dad and the rest of the platoon were encircled by the Germans. Shaumberg told the men to retreat while he tried to provide cover for them. ‘I don’t have a choice,’ he said. It was a suicide mission—everyone knew it, but that’s who Shaumberg was.” Gherkin paused. “Anyway, my daddy lived and Shaumberg died, and after my daddy came home from the war, he said that he’d become a historian, too, as a way to honor his friend.”When Gherkin didn’t continue, Jeremy looked at him curiously. “Why are you telling me this?”“Because,” Gherkin replied, “as I see it, I didn’t have much of a choice, either. Every town needs something to call its own, something to remind folks that their home is special. In New York, you don’t have to worry about that. There’s Broadway and Wall Street and the Empire State Building and the Statue of Liberty. But down here, after all the business closings, I looked around and realized that all we had was a legend. And legends . . . well, they’re just relics from the past, and a town needs more than that to survive. That’s all I was trying to do, searching for a way to keep this town alive, and then you came along.”Jeremy glanced away, thinking about the boarded storefronts he’d seen when he first arrived, remembering Lexie’s comment about the closing of the textile mill and phosphorous mine.“So you came by this morning to give me your side of the story?”“No,” Gherkin said. “I came by to let you know all this was my idea. It wasn’t the town council’s, it wasn’t the folks’ who live here. Maybe I was wrong to do what I did. Maybe you don’t agree with it. But I did what I thought was right for this place and the people who live here. And all I ask is that when you do your story you keep in mind that no one else was involved. If you want to sacrifice me, I can live with that. And I think my daddy would understand.”Without waiting for a response, Gherkin went back to his car, and it soon vanished into the fog.With dawn turning the sky an overcast gray, Jeremy was helping Alvin load the last of the equipment when Lexie arrived.She emerged from the car looking much the same as she did the first time he’d seen her, her violet eyes unreadable even as she met his gaze. In her hand was Gherkin’s diary. For a moment, they faced each other as if neither one knew what to say.Alvin, standing near the open trunk, broke the silence.“Good morning,” he said.She forced a smile. “Hey, Alvin.”“You’re up early.”She shrugged, her eyes flashing back to Jeremy. Alvin looked from one to the other before motioning over his shoulder.“I think I’ll give the room one last check,” he said, despite the fact that no one seemed to be paying attention.When he was gone, Jeremy took a deep breath. “I didn’t think you’d come by,” he said.“To be honest, I wasn’t sure I would, either.”“I’m glad you did,” he said. The gray light reminded him of their walk on the beach near the lighthouse, and he felt with a twisting arc of pain how much he’d come to love her. Though his first instinct was to close the gap between them, her stiff posture kept him at a distance.She nodded toward his car. “You’re packed up and ready to go, I see.”“Yeah,” he said. “All packed up.”“And you finished filming the lights?”He hesitated, hating the banality of their conversation. “Did you really come here to talk about my work or whether my car is packed?”“No,” she said. “I didn’t.”“Why did you come, then?”“To apologize for the way I treated you yesterday at the library. I shouldn’t have acted the way I did. It wasn’t fair to you.”He gave a half-smile. “It’s okay,” he said. “I’ll get over it. And I’m sorry, too.”She held up the diary. “I brought this for you. In case you wanted it.”“I didn’t think you’d want me to use it.”“I don’t,” she answered.“Then why give it to me?”“Because I should have told you about the diary passage and I don’t want you to think that anyone here is engaged in some cover-up. I can see how you might have thought the town was up to something, and this is a peace offering. But I want to assure you that it wasn’t some big scheme—”“I know,” Jeremy interrupted. “The mayor came by this morning.”She nodded, and her eyes dropped before rising to meet his again. In that instant, he thought she was going to say something, but whatever it was, she stopped herself. “Well, I guess that’s it,” she said, pushing her hands into her coat pockets. “I should probably let you finish up so you can be on your way. I’ve never been a fan of long good-byes.”“So this is a good-bye?” he asked, trying to hold her gaze.She looked almost sad as she tilted her head to the side. “It has to be, doesn’t it?”“So that’s it, then? You just came by to tell me it’s over?” He ran his fingers roughly through his hair, frowning. “Don’t I have any say in the matter?”Her voice was quiet when she answered. “We’ve been through all of this, Jeremy. I didn’t come here this morning to argue, and I didn’t come here to make you angry. I came because I was sorry about the way I treated you yesterday. And because I didn’t want you to think that the week meant nothing to me. It did.”Her words felt like physical blows, and he struggled to speak. “But you’re intent on ending this.”“I’m intent on being realistic about it,” she said.“What if I told you that I love you?”She stared at him for a long moment before turning away. “Don’t say that.”He took a step toward her. “But I do,” he said. “I love you. I can’t help the way I feel.”“Jeremy . . . please . . .”He moved more quickly, sensing that he was finally breaching her defenses, his courage building with every step. “I want to make this work.”“We can’t,” she said.“Of course, we can,” he said, rounding the car. “We can figure this out.”“No,” she said, her voice growing more adamant. She took a step backward.“Why not?”“Because I’m going to marry Rodney, okay?”Her words stopped him cold. “What are you talking about?”“Last night after the dance, he came by and we talked. We talked for a long time. He’s honest, he’s hardworking, he loves me, and he’s here. You’re not.”He stared at her, stunned by her announcement. “I don’t believe you.”She stared back, her face impassive. “Believe it,” she said.When Jeremy failed to say anything, she handed him the diary, then raised a hand in a brief wave and began to walk backward with him in her sights, much the way she had that day at the cemetery.“Good-bye, Jeremy,” she said before turning to get in her car.Still frozen in shock, Jeremy heard the ignition turn over and saw her look over her shoulder as she began to back out. He strode forward to put his hand on the hood, trying to stop her. But as the car started to move, he let his fingers glide along the damp surface and finally took a small step back as the car slid into drive.For an instant, Jeremy thought he caught the flash of tears in her eyes. But then he saw her look away, and he knew once and for all he wasn’t going to see her again.He wanted to shout out, telling her to stop. He wanted to tell her that he could stay, that he wanted to stay, that if leaving meant losing her, then going home wasn’t worth it. But the words stayed trapped inside him, and ever so slowly, the car rolled by him, picking up speed as it made its way down the drive.In the fog, Jeremy remained standing, watching until the car turned shadowlike and only the taillights were visible. And then it vanished completely, the sound of the engine fading into the woods.

[Dalyia]

True BelieverTwentyThe rest of the day passed as if he were watching it through someone else’s eyes. Hurt and angry, he barely remembered following Alvin along the highway back toward Raleigh. More than once, he glanced in his rearview mirror, staring back over the black asphalt, watching the cars that followed in the distance, hoping that one of them was Lexie. She’d been perfectly clear in her desire to end the relationship, but even so, he felt a surge of adrenaline whenever he saw a car that resembled hers, and he would slow down to get a better look. Alvin, meanwhile, would move farther into the distance. Jeremy knew he should be paying attention to the road beyond the windshield; instead, he spent most of his time looking back.After dropping off his rental car, he paced the terminal and made his way to the gate. Walking past crowded shops, veering around people who were scurrying his way, he wondered again why Lexie seemed so willing to give up everything they’d shared.On the plane, his thoughts were interrupted when Alvin took a seat next to him.“Thanks for making it so we could sit together,” Alvin said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. He stored his bag in the overhead bin.“Huh?” Jeremy said.“The seats. I thought you were going to take care of them when you checked in. It’s a good thing I asked when I got my boarding pass. I was supposed to sit in the last row.”“Sorry,” Jeremy said. “I guess I forgot.”“Yeah, I guess so,” Alvin said, dropping into the seat next to him. He glanced at Jeremy. “You want to talk about it yet?”Jeremy hesitated. “I’m not sure there’s anything to talk about.”“That’s what you said earlier. But I’ve heard it’s supposed to be good for you. Haven’t you been keeping up with the talk shows lately? Express your feelings, purge your guilt, seek and ye shall find?”“Maybe later,” he mumbled.“Suit yourself,” Alvin said. “If you don’t want to talk, fine. I’ll just take a nap.” He leaned back in his seat and closed his eyes.Jeremy stared out the window as Alvin slept for most of the flight.In the cab he took from La Guardia, Jeremy was bombarded with noise and the hectic pace of the city: businessmen rushing past carrying briefcases, mothers towing small children while attempting to manage shopping bags, the smell of car exhaust, horns honking, and police sirens blaring. It was perfectly normal, a world he’d grown up in and had taken for granted; what surprised him was that as he looked out the car window, trying to orient himself to the reality of his life, he thought of Greenleaf and the utter silence he’d experienced there.Back at his apartment building, his mailbox was stuffed with advertisements and bills; he grabbed it all and trudged up the stairs. Inside the apartment, everything was the same as he’d left it. Magazines lay strewn around the living room, his office was as cluttered as always, and there were still three bottles of Heineken in the refrigerator. After stowing his suitcase in his room, he opened a bottle of beer and carried his computer and satchel to his desk.He had all the information he’d accumulated in the past few days: his notes and copies of the articles, the digital camera containing the photographs he’d shot of the cemetery, the map, and the diary. As he began unpacking, a packet of postcards fell onto the desk, and it took him a moment to remember that he’d picked them up on his first day in town. The top postcard was a view of the town from the river. Removing the wrapper, he began to thumb through the rest of them. He found postcards depicting the town hall, a misty view of a blue heron standing in the shallows of Boone Creek, and sailboats congregating on a blustery afternoon. Halfway through the packet, he found himself pausing at a picture of the library.He sat motionless, thinking of Lexie and realizing again that he loved her.But that was over now, he reminded himself, and he continued shuffling through the postcards. He saw a strangely grainy photograph of Herbs and another of the town as viewed from Riker’s Hill. The final postcard was a picture of the downtown area of Boone Creek, and here he found himself pausing once more.The postcard, a reproduction of an old black-and-white photo, captured the town circa 1950. In the foreground was the theater with well-dressed patrons waiting near the ticket window; in the background stood a decorated Christmas tree in the small green area just off the main street. On the sidewalks, couples could be seen peeking in windows decorated with garlands and lights, or strolling hand in hand. As Jeremy studied the picture, he found himself imagining how the holidays were celebrated in Boone Creek fifty years earlier. In place of boarded storefronts, he saw sidewalks crowded with women wearing scarves and men wearing hats and children pointing upward at an icicle hanging from a signpost.As he looked, Jeremy found himself thinking about Mayor Gherkin. The postcard depicted not only Boone Creek’s way of life half a century before but also the way that Gherkin hoped the town could be again. It was a Norman Rockwell existence, albeit with a southern flair. He held the postcard for a long time, thinking about Lexie and wondering again what he was going to do about the story.The meeting with the television producers was scheduled for Tuesday afternoon. Nate met Jeremy at his favorite steak house, Smith and Wollensky’s, beforehand. Nate was his buoyant self, excited to see Jeremy and relieved to have him back in town under his watchful eye. As soon as he sat down, he began talking about the footage that Alvin had shot, describing the images as fantastic, like “that haunted house in Amityville, but real,” and assuring him that the television executives would love them. For the most part, Jeremy sat in silence listening to Nate jabber on, but when he saw a dark-haired woman leaving the restaurant, her hair exactly the same length as Lexie’s, he felt a lump in his throat and suddenly excused himself to go to the restroom.When he got back, Nate was perusing the menu. Jeremy added sweetener to the iced tea he’d ordered. He, too, scanned the menu and mentioned that he was thinking of having the swordfish. Nate looked up.“But this is a steak house,” he protested.“I know. I’m in the mood for something lighter, though.”Nate’s hand absently traveled to his midsection, as if wondering whether to do the same thing. In the end, he frowned as he set the menu aside. “I gotta go with the strip steak,” he said. “I’ve been thinking about it all morning. But where were we?”“The meeting,” Jeremy reminded him, and Nate leaned forward.“So it’s not ghosts, right?” Nate said. “You mentioned on the phone that you saw the lights but had a pretty good idea of what they were.”“No,” Jeremy said. “It’s not ghosts.”“What are they, then?”Jeremy pulled out his notes and spent the next few minutes telling Nate what he’d learned, beginning with the legend and describing in detail his process of discovery. Even he could hear the monotone in his voice. As Nate listened, he nodded continually, but when he finished, Jeremy could see wrinkles of concern forming on Nate’s forehead.“The paper mill?” he said. “I was hoping it was some sort of government tests or something like that. Like the military testing a new plane or something.” He paused. “And you’re sure it’s not a military train? News folks love to expose anything about the military. Secret weapons programs, things like that. Or maybe you heard something out there that you couldn’t explain.”“Sorry,” Jeremy said, his voice flat, “it’s just light that ricochets off the train. There weren’t any noises.”Watching Nate, Jeremy could see the wheels turning. Nate, Jeremy had come to realize, had better instincts than his editors when it came to stories.“It’s not much,” he said. “Did you find out which version of the legend was true? Maybe there’s something you could do with the race angle.”Jeremy shook his head. “I haven’t been able to confirm that Hettie Doubilet even existed. Aside from the legends, I couldn’t find any record of her in any official documents. And Watts Landing is long gone.”“Look, I don’t mean to be picky here, but you’ve got to pump up your delivery if you want this to work. If you’re not enthusiastic, they’re not going to be excited, either. Am I right or am I right? Of course, I’m right. But come on, be honest with me. You found something else, didn’t you?”“What are you talking about?”“Alvin,” Nate said. “When he dropped off the videos, I asked him about the story just to get his impression, and he mentioned that you found something else that was interesting.”Jeremy’s expression didn’t falter. “He did?”“His words, not mine,” Nate said, looking pleased with himself.“He didn’t tell me what it was, though. He said that was up to you. Which must mean that it’s big.”Staring at Nate, he could practically feel the diary burning a hole through the fabric of his satchel. On the table, Nate fiddled with his fork, turning it over and back again, waiting.“Well,” Jeremy began, knowing his time to make his decision had finally run out.When he didn’t continue, Nate leaned forward. “Yes?”That evening, after the meeting was concluded, Jeremy sat alone in his apartment, absently watching the world outside. It had begun to snow, and the flakes were a swirling, hypnotic mass under the glow of the streetlamp.The meeting had started out well; Nate had revved the producers up to such an extent that they were transfixed by the images they saw. Nate had done the best he could. Afterward, Jeremy told them about the legend, noting their growing interest as he spoke of Hettie Doubilet, and the painstaking way he’d approached the investigation. He interspersed the story of Boone Creek with other investigations into the mysterious, and more than once, he saw the executives glance at each other, clearly trying to figure out how to work him into the show.But as he sat alone later that night, the diary in his lap, he knew he wouldn’t be working with them. His story—the mystery of Boone Creek’s cemetery—was akin to an exciting novel that petered out at the end. The solution was too simple, too pat, and he’d sensed their disappointment by the time he said good-bye. Nate had promised to keep in touch, as they did, but Jeremy knew there would be no further calls.As for the diary, he’d kept that to himself, as he had with Nate earlier.Later, he made a phone call to Mayor Gherkin. Jeremy’s proposal was simple: Boone Creek would no longer promise visitors on the Historic Homes Tour a chance to see ghosts in the cemetery.The word “haunted” would be removed from the brochure, as would any claims that the lights had anything to do with the supernatural. Instead, the legend’s history would be given full play, and visitors could be informed that they just might witness something spectacular. While some tourists might see the lights and wonder aloud if they were the ghosts from the legend, the volunteers who conducted the tours were told never to suggest as much. Finally, Jeremy asked the mayor to remove the T-shirts and cups from his department store downtown.In exchange, Jeremy pomised he would never mention anything about Cedar Creek Cemetery on television, in his column, or in an independent article. He wouldn’t expose the mayor’s plan to turn the town into a ghostly version of Roswell, New Mexico, nor would he tell anyone in the town that the mayor had known the truth all along.Mayor Gherkin accepted the offer. After hanging up, Jeremy called Alvin, whom he swore to secrecy.

[Dalyia]

True BelieverTwenty-oneIn the days following Jeremy’s unsuccessful meeting with the producers, he focused his attention on trying to return to his previous routines. He spoke to his editor at Scientific American. Behind on his deadline and vaguely remembering something Nate had suggested to him, he agreed to do a column about the possible dangers of a low-carbohydrate diet. He spent hours on the Internet, scanning countless newspapers, looking for other stories that might be of interest. He was disappointed to learn that Clausen— with the help of a high-profile publicity firm in New York—had largely weathered the storm after Jeremy’s appearance on Prime-time and was still in negotiations for his own television show. The irony of the situation wasn’t lost on Jeremy, and he spent the rest of the day bemoaning the gullibility of true believers.Little by little, he was getting himself back on track. Or, at least, he thought he was. Though he still thought of Lexie frequently, wondering whether she was busy preparing for her marriage to Rodney, he did his best to force those thoughts out of his mind. They were just too painful. Instead, he tried to resume the life he’d been living before he met Lexie. On Friday night, he went out to a nightclub. It didn’t go particularly well. Instead of mingling and trying to catch the attention of the women standing nearby, he sat at the bar nursing a single beer for most of the night, leaving long before he normally would have. The next day, he visited his family in Queens, but seeing his brothers and their wives playing with their kids only made him wish again for something that could never be.By Monday noon, as another winter storm was settling in, he’d convinced himself that it was really over. She hadn’t called and neither had he. At times, those few days with Lexie seemed like nothing more than the mirage he’d been investigating. It couldn’t have been real, he told himself, but as he sat at his desk, he found himself thumbing through the postcards again, finally pinning the one of the library on the wall behind the desk.He ordered lunch from the Chinese restaurant down the block for the third time in a week, then leaned back in his chair, wondering about the choices he’d made. For an instant, he wondered if Lexie would be eating at the same time he was, but the thought was interrupted by the buzz of the intercom.He grabbed his wallet and headed toward the door. Through the static of the intercom, he heard a female voice.“It’s open. Come on up.”He riffled through his bills, pulled out a twenty, and reached for the door just as he heard the knock.“That was fast,” he said. “Usually it takes . . .”His voice trailed off as the door opened and he saw who was standing before him.In the silence, he and his visitor stared at each other before Doris finally smiled.“Surprise,” she said.He blinked. “Doris?”She stamped the snow off her shoes. “It’s a blizzard out there,” she said, “and it’s so icy I wasn’t sure I was going to make it. The taxi was sliding all over the road.”He continued to stare, trying to make sense of her sudden appearance.She slipped her handbag from her shoulder and met his gaze. “Are you going to make me wait out in the hallway, or are you going to invite me in?”“Yeah . . . of course. Please . . . ,” he said, motioning her inside.Doris moved past him and set her bag on the end table near the door. She glanced around his apartment and removed her jacket. “This is nice,” she said, walking around the living room. “It’s bigger than I thought it would be. But the stairs were a killer. You really need to get the elevator fixed.”“Yeah . . . I know.”She paused at the window. “But the city is beautiful, even in the storm. And so . . . busy. I can see why some people would want to live here.”“What are you doing here?”“I came to talk to you, of course.”“About Lexie?”She didn’t answer right away. Instead, she sighed, then said evenly, “Among other things.” When his brow furrowed, she shrugged. “You wouldn’t happen to have any tea, would you? I’m still a little chilly.”“But . . .”“We’ve got a lot to talk about,” she said, her voice holding steady. “I know you have questions, but it’s going to take a while. So how about some tea?”Jeremy went into the small kitchen and heated a cup of water in the microwave. After adding a tea bag, he carried the cup back to the living room, where he found Doris sitting on the couch. He handed her the cup, and she took a sip almost immediately.“I’m sorry that I didn’t call. I know I should have. You must be pretty shocked. But I wanted to talk to you in person.”“How did you know where I live?”“I talked to your friend Alvin. He told me.”“You talked to Alvin?”“Yesterday,” she said. “He had given his phone number to Rachel, so I called him, and he was kind enough to give me your address. I wish I’d had the chance to meet him while he was in Boone Creek. He seemed like a perfect gentleman.”Jeremy sensed that the small talk was a sign of mounting nervousness and decided to say nothing. He knew she was simply trying to work up to whatever it was she was going to say.The buzzer sounded again and Doris glanced toward the door. “That’s my lunch,” he said, annoyed by the distraction. “Give me a minute, okay?”He rose from his seat, pressed the intercom, and unlocked his door; as he waited, he glimpsed Doris smoothing her blouse. A moment later, she fidgeted again, and for some reason, the fact that she was nervous helped to steady his own nerves. He drew a long breath and stepped out into the hallway, meeting the deliveryman as he emerged from the stairwell.Jeremy came back in and was just about to set the bag of food on the kitchen counter when he heard Doris behind him.“What did you order?”“Beef with broccoli, pork fried rice.”“It smells good.”It was, perhaps, the way she said it that made him smile. “Would you like me to make up a couple of plates?”“I wouldn’t want to take your food.”“There’s plenty,” he said, reaching for some plates. “And besides, didn’t you tell me that you like to talk over a good meal?”He spooned out the food, then brought it to the table; Doris sat down next to him.Again, he decided to let her begin, and they ate in silence for a few minutes.“This is delicious,” she finally said. “I didn’t have any breakfast, and I guess I didn’t realize how hungry I was. It’s quite a trip to get here. I had to leave at crack of dawn, and my flight was delayed. The weather had everything backed up, and for a while there, I wasn’t sure we’d even take off. I was nervous, too. It was the firsttime I’ve ever flown.”“Oh?”“Never had a reason to. Lexie asked me to come up and visit her while she lived up here, but my husband wasn’t in the best of health and I just never got around to it. Then she moved back. She was quite a wreck back then. I know you probably think she’s tough and strong, but that’s just what she wants others to believe. Underneath, she’s like everyone else, and she was crushed by what happened with Avery.” Doris hesitated. “She told you about him, right?”“Yes.”“She suffered in silence, kept up the brave front, but I knew how upset she was. There was nothing I could do for her. She hid it by keeping busy, running from here to there, talking to everyone and trying to make sure they had the impression that she was okay. You can’t imagine how helpless that made me feel.”“Why are you telling me this?”“Because she’s acting the same way now.”Jeremy moved his food around with his fork. “I wasn’t the one who ended it, Doris.”“I know that, too.”“Then why talk to me?”“Lexie won’t listen.”Despite the tension, Jeremy laughed. “I guess that means you think I’m a pushover?”“No,” she said. “But what I’m hoping is that you’re not as stubborn as she is.”“Even if I’m willing to try again, it’s still up to her.”Doris watched him carefully. “Do you really believe that?”“I tried to talk to her. I told her I wanted to find a way to make the relationship work.”Instead of responding to his comment, Doris asked, “You were married once, weren’t you?”“A long time ago. Did Lexie tell you that?”“No,” she said. “I’ve known it since our first conversation.”“Psychic abilities again?”“No, nothing like that. It has more to do with the way you interact with women. You carry yourself with the sort of confidence that a lot of women find appealing. At the same time, I had the sense that you understand what women want, but that for some reason you’re unwilling to give yourself completely.”“What’s this got to do with anything?”“Women want the fairy tale. Not all women, of course, but most women grow up dreaming about the kind of man who would risk everything for them, even knowing they might get hurt.” She paused. “Kind of like the way you went to find Lexie at the beach. That’s why she fell in love with you.”“She’s not in love with me.”“Yes, she is.”Jeremy opened his mouth to deny it but couldn’t. Instead, he shook his head. “It doesn’t matter now, anyway. She’s marrying Rodney.”Doris stared at him. “No, she isn’t. But before you think it was her way of pushing you away, you should know that she only said it so that if you did leave, she wouldn’t lie awake at night wondering why you never came back for her.” She paused, letting that sink in. “And besides, you didn’t really believe her, anyway, did you?”It was the way Doris said this that made him remember his initial response when Lexie first told him about Rodney. No, he suddenly realized, he hadn’t believed it then.Doris reached across the table and took his hand.“You’re a good man, Jeremy. And you deserved the truth, which was why I came up here.”She stood from the table. “I’ve got a flight to catch. If I don’t get back tonight, Lexie’s going to know something’s up. I’d rather she didn’t know I came up here.”“That’s quite a trip. You could have simply called.”“I know. But I had to see your face.”“Why?”“I wanted to know if you were in love with her, too.” She pattedhim on the shoulder before heading to the living room, where shepicked up her handbag. “Doris?” Jeremy called out. She turned. “Yes?” “Did you find the answer you were hoping for?” She smiled. “The real question is, did you?”

[Dalyia]

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